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Most offensive jokes you know

Most offensive jokes you know

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I hear Colorado has the best 3-D horror films in the world.


😕 >sfa51

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There was a poll the other day asking what race you wanted banned from the Olympics. I had a hard time choosing between the Chinese and the Americans - in the end I went for the yanks. Turns out most people voted for the 400m hurdles.


Saddam Hussein tick
Osam Bin Laden tick
Muammar Gaddafi tick
Justin Bieber ___

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That's your mother under the quilt... not me!

3 edits

Oh dear, it looks like it's time to drop the Obama's off at the Oval Office........(grunt)..........(toilet flush)


The score in the soccer/football match (England vs a group of 5 yearolds) ended up 103-0. Better luck next time England.


It's rude for a man to speak dirty words.

It's rude for a lady to speak whilst her mouth is full.

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Originally posted by mikelom
It's rude for a man to speak dirty words.

It's rude for a lady to speak whilst her mouth is full.
It is especially rude for a man to speak dirty words whilst a lady's mouth is full.

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The most offensive joke I used to know was Dubya, but now it's Santorum.

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Ted Lowe - He was the commentator for the snooker television show Pot Black from 1969. He went on to become the "voice of snooker" and led the commentary in many tournaments. He also commentated in what is generally regarded as snooker's greatest final, that between Steve Davis and Dennis Taylor in the 1985 World Snooker Championship.

Lowe uttered the occasional on-air gaffe, his most famous quote being, "and for those of you who are watching in black and white, the pink is next to the green."He once told viewers that Fred Davis, struggling to rest one leg on the edge of the table in order to reach a long shot, "is getting on a bit and is having trouble getting his leg over".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Lowe

-m.

Not offensive, but funny! 😉


Originally posted by mikelom
Ted Lowe - He was the commentator for the snooker television show Pot Black from 1969. He went on to become the "voice of snooker" and led the commentary in many tournaments. He also commentated in what is generally regarded as snooker's greatest final, that between Steve Davis and Dennis Taylor in the 1985 World Snooker Championship.

Lowe uttered the oc ...[text shortened]... eg over".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Lowe

-m.

Not offensive, but funny! 😉
Reminds me of the Brian Johnston gaffe when he pointed out a "dirty, black crowd on the horizon" during an England/India test match (he meant 'cloud' obviously). Think it was Brian Johnston anyway.

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Originally posted by mikelom
That's your mother under the quilt... not me!
Would that sound worse coming from a man or a woman?