Queenslanders call people (like us) from the states south of them Mexicans, but don't make racist jokes about us, we're the same colour as they are.
This one's just average offensive:
Q: Why do Mexicans make refried beans?
A: Ever heard of a Mexican doing something right the first time?
Q: What do you get when you mix a Mexican and an octopus?
A: I don't know either, but imagine that thing picking oranges.
Americans: Seem to think that poverty and failure are morally suspect.
Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.
Brits: Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success, and failure are inherited.
Aussies: Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.
Originally posted by KewpieWhen did you become an expert on What Canadians believe? 😛
Americans: Seem to think that poverty and failure are morally suspect.
Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.
Brits: Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success, and failure are inherited.
Aussies: Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.
Personally I loved the Donald Trump whine after the election. He should be more concerned in doing something with his hair!
Originally posted by KewpieThese are really funny. Do you know any Polish jokes?
Queenslanders call people (like us) from the states south of them Mexicans, but don't make racist jokes about us, we're the same colour as they are.
This one's just average offensive:
Q: Why do Mexicans make refried beans?
A: Ever heard of a Mexican doing something right the first time?
Q: What do you get when you mix a Mexican and an octopus?
A: I don't know either, but imagine that thing picking oranges.
An American, a jew and an Australian were in Iraq trying to find the mysterious weapons of mass destruction when they were assigned a mission. They were to take a highly trained elite sniffer dog to a location 4 blocks away after their commander had a gut feeling they were there after cheating on his wife. One block from their location their humvee struck an IED and they were left with no transport and a group of terrorists between them and their mission.
So they drew straws and the American had to go first. As he was sneaking along the treeline his dog let out a massive fart and gave away their loc. It didn't take long and the sound of a rocket launcher was heard as the American quickly met his maker but the dog escaped without injury or harm and ran back to the jew and Australian.
It was the jews turn next and before he left he told the Australian "I am superior, and through the writtings in the Torah I can run really fast without even using the treeline". The Australian replied that he though he was superior too and wished him luck. It didn't take long and he greeted his maker but the dog escaped without injury or harm and ran back to the Australian.
One hour later the Australian arrived back at the base, alive with the elite trained sniffer dog and more importantly those weapons of mass destruction. He told his commander and unit the story of how the American had died and the jew. How did you do it they asked... how did you get to the mission without the dog farting and giving away your location. The Australian replied with a smile on his face... me not silly, me not dumb, me stick c~o!c~k~ up doggies bum!
Pity I don't know what the missing word was, so I can't make sense of that one!
Here's some more - I found a whole page of these:
Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball and basketball.
Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer and rugby.
Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, and how they beat the Americans twice, playing baseball.
Aussies: Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in every sport they played them in.
Americans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.
Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.
Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.
Originally posted by KewpieYou obviously know NOTHING about Canadians! 😛
Pity I don't know what the missing word was, so I can't make sense of that one!
Here's some more - I found a whole page of these:
Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball and basketball.
Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer and rugby.
Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, and how t ...[text shortened]... ng beer.
Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.
Originally posted by KewpieDon't forget the Irish, we'll drink anything😉
Pity I don't know what the missing word was, so I can't make sense of that one!
Here's some more - I found a whole page of these:
Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball and basketball.
Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer and rugby.
Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, and how t ...[text shortened]... ng beer.
Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.