part 1.
Nobby was an old guy i knew whose main hobby was exchanging views about important philosophical questions such as how many angels could dance on the head of a pin, and what kind of dances they liked to do. he belonged to a club, for which privilege he paid a membership fee each year. he liked to hang out in the clubrooms, and spent the greater part of each day there, seven days a week. the reason he liked it was that, outside the club, people shunned him because he had bored them too many times with his unceasing attempts to impress them. he had become used to the sight of people scattering in all directions as he approached with his walking frame.
inside the club, however, there were always some new people about, people who he hadn't bored previously. fresh meat. whenever he saw someone new in the clubroom, nobby's eyes would light up, and he would rub his hands together. 'howdy stranger, and welcome!' he would beam with an assumed air of bonhomie. he had learned long ago that people would be more likely to listen to him for longer if he buttered them up this way. occasionally, the new member would be a little dim-witted or even actually mentally challenged, and would be genuinely impressed by Nobby's prattling. others would listen politely for a while, making polite responses from time to time, simply because they were polite to everybody, no matter how boring or self-important.
Nobby liked to Give Advice. his Advice fell into these categories: the plain wrong, the bleeding obvious, and the so-vague as to be useless. of the members who had been around longer, a few fell into the category already mentioned - the dim-witted - who were genuinely impressed by Nobby's Advice. these were a tiny minority, however. many members made use of a devilishly clever device that fit into their ears like a hearing aid and allowed them to selectively screen out whatever Nobby was saying. others learnt to simply ignore him the traditional way. some pretended to like him, egging him on in public because they wanted to stir things up a bit for their own amusement, while in their private communications they were more scathingly critical of Nobby than anyone. a few were openly critical of Nobby's blatherings, especially when he tried to force his views about angels and the like onto others, or when he constructed his sentences in such a way that they purported to say one thing, but really were attempts at self-aggrandisement. since these were pretty much Nobby's only modes of communication, he found himself being criticised quite often.
one of Nobby's favourite conversational ploys was to try to dictate the course of any discussion he was in. while other members might suggest topics for conversation, they were quite relaxed and perfectly willing to let the discussion meander in whatever direction it would. Nobby could never allow this, though - he would insist on loudly repeating his original statement on the topic, hoping that people would discuss whatever it was that he wanted to discuss. he did this because he wasn't actually interested in their views at all - he came to the club because he wanted to foist his own views on whatever audience he might be able to gather on the day. another thing he liked to do was revive topics he had started earlier, but which had died out. he did this so often that he annoyed quite a few of the other members, but if any complained, he would smugly point out that he had paid his membership dues, and therefore could revive as many of his own topics as he liked.
deep inside though, he felt a cold inner chill when he heard these complaints. though the owners of the club did not take much of an active interest in its day to day running, they had formed a team of managers who listened to the various conversations going on within the club, and warned members whenever they broke one of the club's rules. if a member continued to break the rule after being warned, the managers would impose a ban of a few days, or a week, or a month. their decisions were often disputed, mainly by the aforementioned members who liked to stir up a bit of trouble for their own amusement. Nobby had himself been banned before, and then he had lied that he had not been told why he had been banned, even though he had. he felt a deep inner chill when the managers looked askance at him, because the club was the only place where people would listen to him at all. if he was permanently banned, whatever would he do to fill the endless empty hours of his life?
to be continued...
Originally posted by Seitsethat's a lot of cool to pack into one character, but i'll try. any Mexicans you want added to the mix?
Thanks.
If casted for subsequent chapters, I would like to be characterized as a cool mixture between Harvey Keitel, Christopher Walken, and Will Arnett.
With the looks of Johnny Depp.
Originally posted by BlackampStill True Today
part 1.
Nobby was an old guy i knew whose main hobby was exchanging views about important philosophical questions such as how many angels could dance on the head of a pin, and what kind of dances they liked to do. he belonged to a club, for which privilege he paid a membership fee each year. he liked to hang out in the clubrooms, and spent the greater pa atever would he do to fill the endless empty hours of his life?
to be continued...
"Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people" -Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962)
😉
