General Forum

General Forum

  1. Standard memberHand of Hecate
    Merciless Vagabond
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    15 May '18 02:351 edit
    Product Review #17: Cremo "Coconut Mango" Shaving Cream.

    So I really like the Cremo shaving cream products. Super smooth. The razor glides effortlessly over your skin and leaves it feeling clean and moisturized. Crap shaving creams leave you with a tight burnt feeling to your skin. Almost like you sand papered off the stubble. Not Cremo though. A little goes a long way and any residue rinses off easily. Assuming you're using a sharp razor, you'll need a minimum off pressure to get a pleasant close shave every time.

    Now along comes their Coconut Mango scented shave cream. "Damn,"I think to myself, "I love Coconut and Mango ain't bad. This is going to be like starting the day off with a Tropical Vacation. F@&$ yeah!" I damn near caressed the smooth and pleasantly yielding tube as I placed it into my basket.

    Smelling the product prior to purchase would have meant pulling off the "sealed for your protection" silver tab. And why would I? Cremo's never steered me wrong before, right?

    Little did I know, but, Cremo has clearly hired a French prostitute, brought her into the lab, and spent countless hours matching the scent of their Coconut Mango Shave Cream up with the scent of said prostitutes @$$hole. I will say this, the product continues to deliver on it's promise of a smooth shave, but, the smell is to Coconut Mango as cooked dog $&!? is to freshly sliced pineapples.

    I give this product a generous 3 Sonhouses out of a possible 10 Sonhouses.
  2. Standard memberapathist
    looking for loot
    western colorado
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    15 May '18 05:291 edit
    Did you just say that sonhouse is the benchmark standard you measure the world against?
  3. Standard memberHand of Hecate
    Merciless Vagabond
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    15 May '18 10:14
    Originally posted by @apathist
    Did you just say that sonhouse is the benchmark standard you measure the world against?
    Yes. He's glorious.
  4. SubscriberVery Rusty
    Treat Everyone Equal
    Halifax, Nova Scotia
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    15 May '18 12:50
    Originally posted by @hand-of-hecate
    Yes. He's glorious.
    And you are full of it!!! 😛

    -VR
  5. SubscriberWOLFE63
    Tra il dire e il far
    C'e di mezzo il mar!
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    15 May '18 13:16
    During my time in the Philippines, the aroma of cooked dog was definitely preferable to the described alternative. However, I did manage to avoid consuming either...I think.
  6. Subscribersonhouse
    Fast and Curious
    slatington, pa, usa
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    15 May '18 13:23
    Originally posted by @hand-of-hecate
    Product Review #17: Cremo "Coconut Mango" Shaving Cream.

    So I really like the Cremo shaving cream products. Super smooth. The razor glides effortlessly over your skin and leaves it feeling clean and moisturized. Crap shaving creams leave you with a tight burnt feeling to your skin. Almost like you sand papered off the stubble. Not Cremo though. A ...[text shortened]... liced pineapples.

    I give this product a generous 3 Sonhouses out of a possible 10 Sonhouses.
    I am so flattered you think we are in all out war. And you such a nice guy and all.
  7. Standard memberHand of Hecate
    Merciless Vagabond
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    15 May '18 14:58
    Originally posted by @sonhouse
    I am so flattered you think we are in all out war. And you such a nice guy and all.
    Look, this is an important product review. Lives are at stake. If you’d be so kind as to get lost I’d appreciate it.
  8. SubscriberVery Rusty
    Treat Everyone Equal
    Halifax, Nova Scotia
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    15 May '18 15:50
    Originally posted by @hand-of-hecate
    Look, this is an important product review. Lives are at stake. If you’d be so kind as to get lost I’d appreciate it.
    I am pretty sure your place as king of the A-Holes is quite secure! 😛 😉

    -VR
  9. Unknown Territories
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    15 May '18 16:07
    Originally posted by @very-rusty
    I am pretty sure your place as king of the A-Holes is quite secure! 😛 😉

    -VR
    I admire your restraint in refraining from calling him king of the B-Holes.

    That would have been most unseemly.

    Good sport.
  10. Standard memberapathist
    looking for loot
    western colorado
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    15 May '18 16:28
    Originally posted by @wolfe63
    During my time in the Philippines, the aroma of cooked dog was definitely preferable to the described alternative. However, I did manage to avoid consuming either...I think.
    Wait. What is better than dog, exactly?
  11. SubscriberWOLFE63
    Tra il dire e il far
    C'e di mezzo il mar!
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    15 May '18 17:09
    Originally posted by @apathist
    Wait. What is better than dog, exactly?
    Oh yeah...sorry if I was vague. I was referring to a prostitute's bum as mentioned in this:

    "Little did I know, but, Cremo has clearly hired a French prostitute, brought her into the lab, and spent countless hours matching the scent of their Coconut Mango Shave Cream up with the scent of said prostitutes @$$hole. I will say this, the product continues to deliver on it's promise of a smooth shave, but, the smell is to Coconut Mango as cooked dog $&!? is to freshly sliced pineapples."

    I was likely being too polite...yeah?
  12. Subscribersonhouse
    Fast and Curious
    slatington, pa, usa
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    15 May '18 19:50
    Originally posted by @hand-of-hecate
    Look, this is an important product review. Lives are at stake. If you’d be so kind as to get lost I’d appreciate it.
    No doubt the latest success of your engineering boss, knowing you could not have come up with it on your own.
  13. Standard memberapathist
    looking for loot
    western colorado
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    16 May '18 21:12
    Originally posted by @wolfe63
    ...
    I was likely being too polite...yeah?
    Um, uh, no I was just slow.
  14. SubscriberLEUR
    TEXAS
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    17 May '18 00:061 edit
    Now maybe I'm dirty, and maybe I smoke a little dope.
    It ain't like I'm going on TV and tearing up pictures of the pope.
    I know I get wild and I know I get drunk.
    But it ain't like I gotta bunch of bodies in my trunk.
    My old man used to call me a no-good punk
    And I still don't know why.

    I Think I'm An Alright Guy
    Todd Snider
  15. Standard memberuzless
    The So Fist
    Voice of Reason
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    17 May '18 03:11
    Originally posted by @hand-of-hecate
    Product Review #17: Cremo "Coconut Mango" Shaving Cream.

    So I really like the Cremo shaving cream products. Super smooth. The razor glides effortlessly over your skin and leaves it feeling clean and moisturized. Crap shaving creams leave you with a tight burnt feeling to your skin. Almost like you sand papered off the stubble. Not Cremo though. A ...[text shortened]... liced pineapples.

    I give this product a generous 3 Sonhouses out of a possible 10 Sonhouses.
    so when are you going to tell the minions here that your shaving cream is not for your face but for your putter and accompanying balls?

    I love the fact that your putter smells like S**it...i bet it's not the first time its smelled that way, eh HOH?
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