Originally posted by Hand of HecateSometimes I think you and I are much more similar than we think.
had to wipe your buttocks with?
I ran out of TP this morning and was forced to use a coffee filter. I almost brained myself waddling into the kitchen to obtain said coffee filter. In the past I've been forced to turn to crumpled up newspaper, some pages out of 'O' magazine, a Guns & Ammo flyer, socks and medicated facial wipes.
I've used all of those, plus once my own underwear, a rock, post-its (that one was really messy), and a cheetos bag (also messy).
Weirdest one was to do it in the sea. The cleaning was a little bit gross, but water cleans everything.
Two young wives, Donna and Tracey, went out for a night on the town. They ate, drank, danced and had a merry old time, but they were good wives and faithful and went home before midnight. On the way home, they were caught short and decided to relieve themselves in the local graveyard.
Donna asked Tracey if she had any tissues, but neither of them had got any. So the Donna decided to use her panties. Tracey said that her panties were a wedding present from her husband, so she used a wreath instead. Then they carried on home, and went to bed, next to their snoring husbands.
The next morning, Tracey's husband rang Donna's husband and asked, "Do you know where our wives went last night?"
"No, but Donna came home without her panties."
"Well, when I woke up this morning, I noticed Tracey was wearing hers, but she had a card stuck on her butt. It said, 'You were wonderful, the best, the greatest. We will never forget you. From all the men at the fire station.'..."
Originally posted by c99ux😵
Two young wives, Donna and Tracey, went out for a night on the town. They ate, drank, danced and had a merry old time, but they were good wives and faithful and went home before midnight. On the way home, they were caught short and decided to relieve themselves in the local graveyard.
Donna asked Tracey if she had any tissues, but neither of them had got any ...[text shortened]... st, the greatest. We will never forget you. From all the men at the fire station.'..."
Originally posted by SeitseI took a dump this morning that was easily as big as three hamsters glued together. Pooped clean, no wipe required, Gold Medal performance.
Sometimes I think you and I are much more similar than we think.
I've used all of those, plus once my own underwear, a rock, post-its (that one was really messy), and a cheetos bag (also messy).
Weirdest one was to do it in the sea. The cleaning was a little bit gross, but water cleans everything.
Originally posted by Hand of HecateCollection notice.
had to wipe your buttocks with?
I ran out of TP this morning and was forced to use a coffee filter. I almost brained myself waddling into the kitchen to obtain said coffee filter. In the past I've been forced to turn to crumpled up newspaper, some pages out of 'O' magazine, a Guns & Ammo flyer, socks and medicated facial wipes.
a friend of mine joined the army and claimed that during training, he was assigned one...ONE !... square of TP to take care of business. He further claimed that he was taught how to accomplish this magical feat and that one quare proved to be plenty.
my friend was never known to be a liar or even one to tell tall tales/exaggerate. I conclude that the army teaches enlistees to lie.
Originally posted by slappy115I've had to resort to this tactic several times. Hiking, invariably, squeezes a big one out for me. Though typically I'm civilized enough to at least bury my leavings. I hesitate to ask what you did with said poo covered undies after two years in the woods.
One time I was out in the woods and my boxers were falling apart to begin with. So when I squatted, I ripped the boxers off (without taking my pants off) and used them. They remained in the woods for like two years (they were pink, ugliest boxers I have ever owned).
Originally posted by Hand of HecateSOCKS?! Ewwwwww.
had to wipe your buttocks with?
I ran out of TP this morning and was forced to use a coffee filter. I almost brained myself waddling into the kitchen to obtain said coffee filter. In the past I've been forced to turn to crumpled up newspaper, some pages out of 'O' magazine, a Guns & Ammo flyer, socks and medicated facial wipes.
Probably the worst for me were glossy newspaper ads. They aren't absorbent and when you crumple them they grow spikes.