22 Jun '14 16:33>
I've been brushed by death. Really. Due to personal reasons, I've spent months without end at a hospice ward, seeing people walking the last meters or actually passing, right next to me --I mean, in the next bed, in front of my eyes.
So, death has turned into a kind of non-subject for me, something which will happen with or without my consent, and a thing to be acknowledged calmly. Period. That is, until yesterday, when I had the terrible idea of watching actual footage of a police officer being shot. Nothing in camera, as the gun battle takes place outside the frame of the patrol's recorder, but you can hear the guy yelling in horror, feeling his eye has been gauged with a bullet, and you can then hear his last gasps.
Hair raising. I tell you. I have seen, smelled, heard and touched death before. However, for some reason, this particular video (a video!) shocked me profoundly. I don't know why. It's kind of confusing.
Has any of you experienced something like this? Thoughts?
So, death has turned into a kind of non-subject for me, something which will happen with or without my consent, and a thing to be acknowledged calmly. Period. That is, until yesterday, when I had the terrible idea of watching actual footage of a police officer being shot. Nothing in camera, as the gun battle takes place outside the frame of the patrol's recorder, but you can hear the guy yelling in horror, feeling his eye has been gauged with a bullet, and you can then hear his last gasps.
Hair raising. I tell you. I have seen, smelled, heard and touched death before. However, for some reason, this particular video (a video!) shocked me profoundly. I don't know why. It's kind of confusing.
Has any of you experienced something like this? Thoughts?