1. Subscribercoquette
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    Omaha, Nebraska, USA
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    05 May '07 20:56
    He came in drunk yesterday and went straight to bed and fell asleep with his clothes on. In the morning, he looked out his window and immediately committed suicide.

    Why?
  2. Leuven
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    06 May '07 12:28
    I think he lust have seen something that made him think he was in hell or heaven or something like that, but don't have a clue yet as to what it is.
  3. SubscriberAThousandYoung
    All My Soldiers...
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    06 May '07 16:01
    He works in a lighthouse and forgot to turn it on before he went to sleep. Outside is a wrecked ship.
  4. USA
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    06 May '07 16:07
    Originally posted by AThousandYoung
    He works in a lighthouse and forgot to turn it on before he went to sleep. Outside is a wrecked ship.
    you seem so sure.....
  5. Subscribercoquette
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    06 May '07 16:37
    Originally posted by AThousandYoung
    He works in a lighthouse and forgot to turn it on before he went to sleep. Outside is a wrecked ship.
    This is the answer that I had heard from my uncle, but i suppose there could be other good ones.
  6. SubscriberAThousandYoung
    All My Soldiers...
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    06 May '07 17:10
    The way I heard it, the fact that the man turned off the light before going to sleep was mentioned. This makes my reply more clear.
  7. Joined
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    06 May '07 19:49
    Alternatively he has recurring random blindness, and after an operation in which he hoped to have cured it he wakes up to find he is again blind, has had enough and commits suicude.
  8. Joined
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    06 May '07 23:25
    He looks outside and sees his newspaper on the porch with the headline "BULLETS TO HEAD NO LONGER LETHAL." Reading the article (his window is really close to the porch -- work with me here), he discovers that scientists have finally found a cure for bullets and distributed it during the night. This doesn't sound very plausible, but our hero has a tragic flaw: he has a getting-shot-in-the-head fetish. All his life he's fantasized about getting shot in the head; only the knowledge that he would immediately die has kept him from indulging himself. So although he knows, rationally, that this news story is almost certainly mistaken, the temptation is now too strong to resist. His dream has come true. Without thinking, he pulls out one of the many guns he keeps nearby for just such a situation and fires.

    Watching through binoculars, his arch-enemy -- a guy he once cut off in traffic -- cackles. His revenge is complete.

    A week later, he's found dead in a locked room with a puddle of water and a goat, but that's another story.
  9. Subscribersonhouse
    Fast and Curious
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    09 May '07 10:041 edit
    Originally posted by coquette
    He came in drunk yesterday and went straight to bed and fell asleep with his clothes on. In the morning, he looked out his window and immediately committed suicide.

    Why?
    He looked out the window and saw that in his drunken stupor he had run over his 3 year old son who lay dead underneath the wheels of his car.
  10. Standard memberemanon
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    Leuven
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    09 May '07 13:48
    because he saw a sign, alcohol from now on illegal, the only reason why he yet lived?
  11. Going where needed.
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    17 May '07 17:15
    because he was the leader of a cult and he told all his followers to go home and take cyanide last night. he went and got drunk and came home. he woke up in the morning to find it was a great day and he killed himself.
  12. Joined
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    17 May '07 19:56
    Originally posted by AThousandYoung
    He works in a lighthouse and forgot to turn it on before he went to sleep. Outside is a wrecked ship.
    And why would you kill yourself over that. rather than doing the honourable thing and at least try to help any survivors?

    Nah. His wife had kicked him out and he was living in some rented room. He hated his life, and already wanted to kill himself. But last night, he was too drunk to manage even that. In the morning, he looks out the window and is reminded that he doesn't live in a nice, suburban villa any more, but in a squalid eight-floor back room, so he jumped out.

    Richard
  13. Earth
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    17 May '07 21:58
    Hmmm, if we all commited suicide when life got tough, we would all be dead by 30.

    Maybe he realised he was reminded he was the only survivor of an 'armegedon'
  14. tinyurl.com/ywohm
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    17 May '07 22:55
    Originally posted by coquette
    He came in drunk yesterday and went straight to bed and fell asleep with his clothes on. In the morning, he looked out his window and immediately committed suicide.

    Why?
    He lives on a house boat and when he woke up it was out at sea?

    He woke up wearing a Cincinnati Reds uniform?
  15. Going where needed.
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    17 May '07 23:571 edit
    Originally posted by kathleen1
    Hmmm, if we all commited suicide when life got tough, we would all be dead by 30.

    Maybe he realised he was reminded he was the only survivor of an 'armegedon'
    that's what i meant. he was a part of a cult that thought the world would end the next day. so he got drunk after he told his followers to drink cyanide. he went home and went to bed. next morning he wakes up and shoots himself because his wife and kids were part of this cult and they took the cyanide and it was a perfectly normal day the next day. so he shoots himself because he has nothing left to live for.

    edit: there. better phrased?
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