Chess related jokes
10 Mar '19 13:37I wonder if we could use a joke section or Forum, somewhere I can park this one; a joke that keeps growing longer as various players add in more and more ideas/puns?
or do we already have such a location, that I don't know of?
Did I ever mention to you that I once went out on a date with a fine babe, her name was Angeline? Not knowing how things would turn out, but wanting to make a good impression, since I was a fellow with lots of good rooks, when she shared with me that she liked chess, I turned to Angeline and muttered: "I dream that one day you will be the Queen to my King! Maybe we could live in a castle, or perhaps on a boat where you would be my ideal ship mate. Whatever happens I can promise you one hell of a knight. I just hope I won't have to pawn all my stuff to pay for it!".........she just oh so calmly turned her back toward me and puttered away......into the sunset....NEVER to be seen or heard from again...another one of the many en passants I've had over the decades...but, lucky for me, and for her, we did not get forked! And, I could also have been stuck to pay the check, mate! And, it could have been worse. For Angeline's hubby, a rank and file officer in the NAVY, could have shown up and speared both of us; and then we really would have been rooked!.....At least she never found out that I'm a son of a Bishop! AND finally, we all know, that a Bishop can take a queen from behind! Ouch! I was clearly lucky to survive with my Zugswang intact.
But, all in all, all things considered here, I think I just played too adventurous a gambit there. If, if, if only I had played it slow and positional before long I would have been mating! Of course, 'things could have been worse, had we stayed together, w'd very likely have soon got board.'!
But what the heck, who needs women, when we have such wonderful pawnography?
or do we already have such a location, that I don't know of?
Did I ever mention to you that I once went out on a date with a fine babe, her name was Angeline? Not knowing how things would turn out, but wanting to make a good impression, since I was a fellow with lots of good rooks, when she shared with me that she liked chess, I turned to Angeline and muttered: "I dream that one day you will be the Queen to my King! Maybe we could live in a castle, or perhaps on a boat where you would be my ideal ship mate. Whatever happens I can promise you one hell of a knight. I just hope I won't have to pawn all my stuff to pay for it!".........she just oh so calmly turned her back toward me and puttered away......into the sunset....NEVER to be seen or heard from again...another one of the many en passants I've had over the decades...but, lucky for me, and for her, we did not get forked! And, I could also have been stuck to pay the check, mate! And, it could have been worse. For Angeline's hubby, a rank and file officer in the NAVY, could have shown up and speared both of us; and then we really would have been rooked!.....At least she never found out that I'm a son of a Bishop! AND finally, we all know, that a Bishop can take a queen from behind! Ouch! I was clearly lucky to survive with my Zugswang intact.
But, all in all, all things considered here, I think I just played too adventurous a gambit there. If, if, if only I had played it slow and positional before long I would have been mating! Of course, 'things could have been worse, had we stayed together, w'd very likely have soon got board.'!
But what the heck, who needs women, when we have such wonderful pawnography?
