1 These are the unauthorised teaching of Jesus, 2 Things that are of common sense to every man woman & child apon this earth,3 Fictitious words, that had Jesus been alive today, he may well have spoken, 4 Please feel free to add you own perils of wisdom.
Blessed are the Homosexuals
1 And Jesus said unto the disciples, fear not thy homosexuals. 2 For they have two arms, two legs, a head & body, just like all humans apon this earth. 3 For they are happy and gay and do nobody any harm. 4 Then Paul said, Jesus I am afraid, for they may want to kiss me. 5 And Jesus answered, what does it matter?. 6 For if someone wishes to kiss thou, is it not a great honour?. 7 Then Paul did reply, but I am not one of them, what should I do ? 8 Where apon Jesus replied, you must be kind, 9 treat them like an ugly women. 10 Explain to them, that you are not batting for the other side. 11 Then they will understand the truth and just be thy friend.
John Questions Jesus Judgement
12 Then John exclaimed, but its disgusting & unnatural. 13 Then Jesus did say, it is true that it is not to all mens taste, 14 But it is their life, and they should be allowed to do what they want. 15 Just as you should be allow to do what you want. 16 Jesus continues, anyway you of all the disciples, should be happy that there are homosexuals. 17 To which John replied, how so? 18 And Jesus answered, well the more of them that there are, means that there are more free women for you. 19 Then even an bald ugly fat bloke, like yourself, will be able to get a girlfriend. 20 To which the disciples did see that Jesus was right. 21 And mended the error of their ways, 22 Showing no further malice against Homosexuals.