1. Joined
    23 Jul '05
    Moves
    8869
    21 Feb '07 21:39
    Inspired by the television program mock the week - unlikely things to find in the bible.

    I'll start:

    He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy.

    😉
  2. Subscribersonhouse
    Fast and Curious
    slatington, pa, usa
    Joined
    28 Dec '04
    Moves
    52613
    21 Feb '07 21:51
    Is that a thorn in your pocket or are you happy to see me?
  3. Joined
    23 Jul '05
    Moves
    8869
    21 Feb '07 23:00
    There's all 14 commandments, now are you going to remember them all?
  4. Standard memberscottishinnz
    Kichigai!
    Osaka
    Joined
    27 Apr '05
    Moves
    8592
    21 Feb '07 23:04
    Originally posted by Bad wolf
    Inspired by the television program mock the week - unlikely things to find in the bible.

    I'll start:

    He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy.

    😉
    "And Jesus amused all on the mount with his comedic anal gas impersonations of farm animals"
  5. Joined
    23 Jul '05
    Moves
    8869
    21 Feb '07 23:10
    When God said: 'let there be light'
    Chuck Norris said: 'Please'.
  6. Hmmm . . .
    Joined
    19 Jan '04
    Moves
    22131
    21 Feb '07 23:11
    "Once upon a time... "

    (Rather than "In the beginning." Though I know of a rabbi who translated the opening words exactly that way...)
  7. Joined
    27 Sep '06
    Moves
    9651
    21 Feb '07 23:12
    The word "supernatural" does not appear in the bible.
  8. Joined
    23 Jul '05
    Moves
    8869
    21 Feb '07 23:261 edit
    You can take slaves from neighbouring nations.

    Edit: Oops! That's already in there. 😉
  9. Standard memberRBHILL
    Acts 13:48
    California
    Joined
    21 May '03
    Moves
    223256
    22 Feb '07 01:39
    Originally posted by Bad wolf
    You can take slaves from neighbouring nations.

    Edit: Oops! That's already in there. 😉
    LOL, can you be mine?
  10. Standard memberKnightWulfe
    Chess Samurai
    Yes
    Joined
    26 Apr '04
    Moves
    66095
    22 Feb '07 02:07
    Originally posted by Bad wolf
    There's all 14 commandments, now are you going to remember them all?
    Thats 15 commandments and he dropped one of the tablets, so now there is only ten!
  11. Cape Town
    Joined
    14 Apr '05
    Moves
    52945
    22 Feb '07 07:29
    Originally posted by josephw
    The word "supernatural" does not appear in the bible.
    Which translation? Clearly English words don't occur in Hebrew versions, but claims about English translations must state the translation or they are false.
  12. SubscriberAThousandYoung
    Just another day
    tinyurl.com/y8wgt7a5
    Joined
    23 Aug '04
    Moves
    24791
    22 Feb '07 07:54
    Jesus making a false prediction.

    Jesus predicts that he will be "in the heart of the earth" for three days and three nights. If by this he meant that he would be in the tomb for three days and three nights, then either he was mistaken or the gospels are in error. Because according to the gospels (this is one of the few things they all seem to agree on), Jesus was in the tomb for only one day and two nights. [Matthew] 12:40

    http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/abs/nt.html
  13. Joined
    23 Jul '05
    Moves
    8869
    22 Feb '07 18:37
    And Jesus woke up! It was all a horrific nightmare!
  14. Joined
    14 May '03
    Moves
    89724
    23 Feb '07 00:37
    Facts and or logical truths. (i.e - that can be substantiated)
  15. Standard memberEAPOE
    Earl of Rochester
    Restoration London
    Joined
    22 Dec '05
    Moves
    7135
    23 Feb '07 00:541 edit
    Originally posted by Bad wolf
    And Jesus woke up! It was all a horrific nightmare!
    Just like Dallas. . . . But I bet Jesus woke up face down in the pub, shoved back to life by the strong smell of a domestos rich mop, pushing a sickly smile into his cheek.

    Even the son of God has his bottom to reach. . . . .
Back to Top