Originally posted by Bosse de Nage
That certainly puts some of your comments into perspective.
Do you now consider yourself saved?
I think the two most common xian opinions of my status (note: this excludes those who actually knew me when I was a believer) are the following:
1) You were saved, but now you've backslidden and lost your salvation.
2) You thought you were saved, but obviously weren't, because otherwise you'd still believe.
I think the second is just an evasion to prevent meaningful reflection. Much easier to ignore a vexing counterexample if you can define it out of existence.
Personally, I wouldn't call myself "saved" in the evangelical sense. I don't feel as though I've avoided any impending doom. I'd say that I'm "free" from an enslavement. I feel more alive and aware of my reality. It's like having lived your whole life on opiates, and then coming out of the stupor. No longer certain of the world's origin, purpose, and destination, I am now earnestly curious about all of nature. I am free to ask questions and consider empirical evidence, without fear.
It's also nice to shrug off the shizophrenic self-image that I touched on earlier.