I know this might be be the right forum or even the right place but it's late and I'm getting alot of conflicting information over this. Sooo....
When a baby returns from a weekend visit with their father and has bruises should there be a need for concern. Not just once but both overnight visits to date. Both bruises (one from each visit) being on her face/head.
After pleading with judges and telling lawyers that supervised visitations should be highly recommended I'm now being told that I'm over reacting. There wasn't even an explanation offered as to what happened and apparently I don't have the right to know.
Is it just me and my own experience but is this absolute insanity!
Originally posted by mokkoInsanity is a good word for it.
I know this might be be the right forum or even the right place but it's late and I'm getting alot of conflicting information over this. Sooo....
When a baby returns from a weekend visit with their father and has bruises should there be a need for concern. Not just once but both overnight visits to date. Both bruises (one from each visit) being on her fac ...[text shortened]... t have the right to know.
Is it just me and my own experience but is this absolute insanity!
Kelly
Thank you. I did take pictures but I'm not sure if they'll come out , lighting and everything can be very crucial. I did contact a child services worker who is going to ask about the bruises. I also phoned the police officers who are familair with the case, they have yet to return any of my phone calls. I was informed by my lawyer that I'm only making matters worse for myself. I can't understand how. But then again I can't understand how any of this has been able to transpire the way it has.
I'm all for the rights of fathers to be apart of their childrens lives but I can't help but feel the system has begun to lump all cases together and steryeotype all women as vengeful ex's giving certain fathers all sorts of rights even when they weren't ideal fathers to begin with.
What ever happened to the supposed best interests of the child? Especially an infant who can in no way speak or defend themselves. Have the courts gone too far in siding with the rights of the fathers because of past discriminations and removing the rights of a mother who has been the sole care giver for their child?
Should courts, specifically individual judges, have the authority to to rip families apart and put children in potential harms way? What accountability do these judges have in the long term for the repercussions of their decisions? Any thoughts or ideas?
Originally posted by mokkoI think you have a cause for concern. I know that kids will get bruises as a part of growing up at least my nine did but, in your case they are appearing everytime they come back from their visiting their father. Take pictures and take them to the doctor everytime it happens. It also covers your behind if the social workers get involved. Does your ex live with another lady? Sounds like he may be living with a vindictive lady that is jealous with his relationship with the kids.
Thank you. I did take pictures but I'm not sure if they'll come out , lighting and everything can be very crucial. I did contact a child services worker who is going to ask about the bruises. I also phoned the police officers who are familair with the case, they have yet to return any of my phone calls. I was informed by my lawyer that I'm only making matte ...[text shortened]... se judges have in the long term for the repercussions of their decisions? Any thoughts or ideas?
Originally posted by slimjimNot that I'm aware of. He's taking her out of town though every other weekend. He has a violent temper and there's currently charges against him in criminal court but it doesn't seem to affect the family court situation. On his return to town he's living in a holiday trailor on a construction site. I do realize toddlers get bruises but I've been voicing my concern for some time now after living with this mans temper for nearly two years. At what point do the people who hold the power to make these kinds of decisions become accountable for their actions? This is what I would like to know.
I think you have a cause for concern. I know that kids will get bruises as a part of growing up at least my nine did but, in your case they are appearing everytime they come back from their visiting their father. Take pictures and take them to the doctor everytime it happens. It also covers your behind if the social workers get involved. Does your ex live wi ...[text shortened]... ike he may be living with a vindictive lady that is jealous with his relationship with the kids.
Originally posted by mokkoI would buck the courts and tell him that he isn't taking her out without supervision anymore. The sqeaky wheel always gets the grease.
Not that I'm aware of. He's taking her out of town though every other weekend. He has a violent temper and there's currently charges against him in criminal court but it doesn't seem to affect the family court situation. On his return to town he's living in a holiday trailor on a construction site. I do realize toddlers get bruises but I've been voicing ...[text shortened]... hese kinds of decisions become accountable for their actions? This is what I would like to know.
Originally posted by slimjimIf you interfer with his custody rights (however wrong you think the courts were in granting them) then you can be sent to jail. It doesn't matter what you have at that point they won't look at it.
You won't go to jail if you have the documented photos and and reports from the doctor. No judge is going to put you in jail with the facts.
However, if you present the evidence to them beforehand the whole thing can be dealt with.
Originally posted by mokkoWell, objectify the situation for a minute.
I know this might be be the right forum or even the right place but it's late and I'm getting alot of conflicting information over this. Sooo....
When a baby returns from a weekend visit with their father and has bruises should there be a need for concern. Not just once but both overnight visits to date. Both bruises (one from each visit) being on her fac ...[text shortened]... t have the right to know.
Is it just me and my own experience but is this absolute insanity!
You are very bitter about this ex-partner. In this post and in previous posts. That has got to show in your handling of the situation and the authorities will probably have noticed this as well. That does nothing to improve your standing and only serves to undermine your aims and goals.
It will create an image of you as bitter and subjective on any matter concerning your ex.
So from the authorities point of view, you'll probably be seen as slightly hysterical. They have to take the baby into consideration and the general view on this is that unless proven otherwise, it's best that both parents have rights to raise their child.
There have been some good suggestion already. Probably the best bet is to go to your GP with the baby and show the bruising to create a dossier of abuse. BUT (and this is quite important), considering your bitterness and the image you've created about yourself, you could raise the suspicion that you yourself are battering the child when it comes back from visits, to undermine your ex's position (like a form of Munchausen by proxy).
To completely objectify the situation, you should get a friend to bring the child and collect the child one time. And a parent to bring and collect the child another time. These witnesses can then prove that the child was handed to your ex without facial bruising and that the bruising occured before you set eyes on the child.
Talk this strategy through with your GP. I can't take local laws, etc. into consideration.