Originally posted by Grampy Bobby
Little guy apparently had mental toughness, something the big guy hadn't encountered in his previous confrontations. Any thoughts on factors that may gradually convert an infant into a bully (other than a neglectful mother and brutish father)?
I think there are many other factors involved, and many different kinds of bullies. And those factors can be mixed and matched to provide us with a diverse rainbow collection of different flavors and varieties. Some seem to be reasonable and passive on the surface, and their victims won't always know "what went wrong" when something does go wrong. Personally, I think the sly ones are the scariest, because it's often not clear what they are up to or how to deal with them.
Not everyone becomes a bully because of neglect or bullying. Some people might become bullies because of being bullied, and others will hate it and learn to deal with it without becoming one. And some people end up dealing with it by becoming permanent victims... not the best way to deal with it, but in their own minds the matter has been resolved and that can provide at least some relief for them.
I think one cause can simply be because of the payoff, like the temporary feel good payoff some drugs are able to deliver... in other words they do it because of how
good it makes them feel. Drugs can make people feel powerful, and we are all able to produce our own natural feel good drugs (endorphins). I believe there are hereditary (naturally more aggressive) and environmental factors that mix in with all of this as well.
I'm making this sound more complicated than it really is. In my opinion bullies are basically narcissists, some are cowards trying to overcome their own self esteem issues and others are just naturally inclined to lord it over and exert power over other people.