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dear diary

dear diary

General


dear diary,

i tossed this to the internet four years ago
it got tossed back at me today

desire for a thing
is what causes the pain
it is not her presence
or absence
words
or silence
activities
or the dearth of
it is only desire
disguised as love
that is what causes the pain

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dear diary,

i dreamed of office supplies
and an office supply closet where i can hide

Which of these is a standard paper size?

0% Idiotsheet
0% Dumbbonnet
100% Foolscap
0% Stupidtopper
4 votes • Final results


dear diary,

i may have found the original source of the gibberish foaming in my brain
it's paul and john's fault

here come old flat-top, he come grooving up slowly
he got ju-ju eyeball, he one holy roller
he got hair down to his knees
got to be a joker, he just do what he please

he wear no shoeshine, he got toe-jam football
he got monkey finger, he shoot coca-cola
he say, “i know you, you know me"
one thing i can tell you is you got to be free

he bag production, he got walrus gumboot
he got ono sideboard, he one spinal cracker
he got feet down below his knees
hold you in his armchair, you can feel his disease

he roller-coaster, he got early warnin'
he got muddy water, he one mojo filter
he say, “one and one and one is three"
got to be good-lookin', 'cause he's so hard to see


come together


@rookie54 said
dear diary,

i dreamed of office supplies
and an office supply closet where i can hide

[poll]BAB107697FD1BB9979B568024A6AB31C[/poll]
Do I get a prize for voting correctly without guessing?

1 edit

[deleted for self-pity]


@Arkturos said
Do I get a prize for voting correctly without guessing?
absolutely
you get both a participation trophy
AND
a redacted trophy!

you are even encouraged to select yer very own prize from our extensive prize catalog of ancient and exotic weapons
(only one guillotine per)


@rookie54 said
absolutely
you get both a participation trophy
AND
a redacted trophy!

you are even encouraged to select yer very own prize from our extensive prize catalog of ancient and exotic weapons
(only one guillotine per)
In general I seem to favor a lightning staff. 😉


@Arkturos

May I recommend the Statue of Trepidation. wicked.


Dear Diary,

It's unlikely I would ever get around to it, but maybe sometime I should check the transits to my natal chart for the moment I changed my username -- because I must say (just between you and me and myself), this new iteration has turned out to be rather awesome!


dear diary,

today i read a most heartbreaking story from "Tales to Horrify"
it seems that some of the fortunate to have access to food have been stymied by the snapping of a dip chip when inserted into the aforementioned dip
and then, to add insult to injury, when a second chip was introduced in a valiant effort to rescue and retrieve the first chip, it too, snapped like a twig and even minutely soiled the dipper's finger with unchipped dip

i mollified myself, reminding me that i was taught many years ago by not one, but every single dog who has owned me that they have never had to use any sort of utensil or even their paws to consume nutrition

i was so chuffed by this realization i stuck my face right in my bowl of rice and beans and savored the moment


Dear Diary,

Was it ever correct for me to call you "Dear"? Seems kind of creepy.

It seems that fireflies and sparklers and Ray Bradbury will never come to save me.

And it doesn't matter whether I ever come to grips with that or not.

But the suffering is fine. If I were not alive in the first place, I wouldn't be here to "enjoy" the suffering.


dear diary,

yesterday as i ran errands from the farmer's market to the dispensary i reflected upon the absurdity of buying eggs on the street and weed from the store

if i had known that hallucinations were going to be so prevalent i would have gotten old when i was young


Dear Diary,

I wish I could just take a pill or have an injection so that I can read all the Hanzi and know all the words and phrases and slang and refs.

It's a sincere wish. May the King of Heaven grant it.


Dear Diary,

Doesn't this thread remind you of the MTV Confessional Room?


Dear Diary,

I have had the opportunity to express my love and appreciation to some other people, and that alone is something.

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