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dear diary

dear diary

General


i went to see her again last night
she charged me double
my tears meant nothing to her


that's sad


@rookie54 said
i went to see her again last night
she charged me double
my tears meant nothing to her
Your dentist?


@Kewpie said
Your dentist?
A dentist who works night shift? I rather doubt it.


@Kewpie said
Your dentist?
His therapist 😁


@A-Unique-Nickname said
His therapist 😁
Emergency call.


@A-Unique-Nickname said
His therapist 😁
I believe he speaks cryptically about an elephant.


Getting charged at once by an elephant is bad enough, but twice. Poor chap.


@Ghost-of-a-Duke said
I believe he speaks cryptically about an elephant.


Getting charged at once by an elephant is bad enough, but twice. Poor chap.
Exactly, what poor guy gives give money to a silly elephant?

Wait, my hippo friend is calling looking for money, be right back.

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@A-Unique-Nickname said
Exactly, what poor guy gives give money to a silly elephant?

Wait, my hippo friend is calling looking for money, be right back.
Don't do it!!!


Hippos are the worst for paying back debts.


dear diary,

twelve days ago the warmth from the star was intense enough to prompt me to turn on my energy inefficient air cooling equipment
i did not do so, and was sweaty

today i begin to thaw frozen pipes and hope they do not burst

i baked a loaf of sour bread
i am a lucky man


Dear diary,

Today I stole a loaf of sour bread, left carelessly by an open window.


Dear diary

I hope the media calls me the Sour Bread Killer.


@rookie54

Tell the palm-reader to charge the same rates at night. jeeesh


dear diary,

today i recycled some olde pixels

i just watched two fools in debate
i could have but didn't get irate
the discourse was dumb
intellectual chewing gum
that they each thought they won was quaint


Dear Diary,

When will the aliens beam me up?
"Swing low, sweet chariot"
Should I pack a bag?

On the other hand, I might panic in a ship out in space,
perhaps even more than on a ship at sea.

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