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Favourite dumb questions

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Ro

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Bored at work. It's Friday, so here is my mine.

Easyjet check-in staff member (honest)

"Has anyone put anything into your bag without your knowledge?"

I missed the plane thinking about that one.....

P

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The police are always good for a dumb question....

On getting out of the car...

"Is that your vehicle sir"

"Duh no i knicked it, what do you think"

F
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London

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lawyer: " and were you present when your picture was taken?"

Amaurote
No Name Maddox

County Doledrum

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"Hello?"

I've never quite worked out how to answer that one.

a

omnipresent

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Lawyer: So he tried to kill you. Did he succeed?

F
9 Edits

London

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Originally posted by angie88
Lawyer: So he tried to kill you. Did he succeed?
you can just go on and on with lawyer ones lol. no doubt no1marauder is responsible for half of them 😛

lawyer: " and you've commited suicide 4 times, correct?"

a
Enola Straight

mouse mouse mouse

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Lawyer: How was your marriage separated?
Man: By death
Lawyer: Whose death?


Lawyer: Before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Doctor: No
Lawyer: Did you look for any other vital signs?
Doctor: No
Lawyer: Then how did you know that the patient was actually dead at the time of the autopsy?
Doctor: Because I had his brain sitting next to me in a jar.
Lawyer: But isn't it still possible that he was alive.
Doctor: Yes, he could've been alive and off practicing law somewhere.

N
The eyes of truth

elsewhere

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Originally posted by ark13
Lawyer: How was your marriage separated?
Man: By death
Lawyer: Whose death?


Lawyer: Before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Doctor: No
Lawyer: Did you look for any other vital signs?
Doctor: No
Lawyer: Then how did you know that the patient was actually dead at the time of the autopsy?
Doctor: Because I had his brain sitting ne ...[text shortened]... sible that he was alive.
Doctor: Yes, he could've been alive and off practicing law somewhere.
lol

d
The Godfather

e8

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The following questions from lawyers were taken from official court
records nationwide.

1) Was that the same nose you broke as a child?

2) Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in
most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about
it until the next morning?

3) Q: What happened then?
A: He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because you can identify
me.'
Q: Did he kill you?

4) Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?

5) The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

6) Were you alone or by yourself.

7) How long have you been a French Canadian?

8) Do you have any children or anything of that kind?

9) Q: I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture.
A: That's me.
Q: Were you present when that picture was taken?

10) Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?

11) Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

12) Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
A: I'll be three months on November 8.
Q: Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?
A: Yes.
Q: What were you doing at that time?

13) Q: Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotionally stable?
A: I used to be.
Q: How many times have you committed suicide?

14) So you were gone until you returned?

15) Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there girls?

16) You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like,
but can you describe it?

17) Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?

18) Q: Have you lived in this town all your life?
A: Not yet.

19) A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing a
stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your Honor, I'd like
to strike the next question."

20) Q: Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body
of Mr. Edington at the rose Chapel?
A: It was in the evening. The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Edington was dead at the time, is that correct?
A: No, you stupid, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy!

http://www.lectlaw.com/files/fun33.htm

F
9 Edits

London

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Originally posted by dfm65
The following questions from lawyers were taken from official court
records nationwide.

1) Was that the same nose you broke as a child?

2) Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in
most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about
it until the next morning?

3) Q: What happened then?
A ...[text shortened]... he table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy!

http://www.lectlaw.com/files/fun33.htm
Lawyer: "How far apart were the cars at the time of impact?"

---

" And what gear where you in at the time of the accident?"

"Gucci sweats and Reebok trainers"

😕

shavixmir
Lord

Sewers of Holland

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Originally posted by Rank outsider
Bored at work. It's Friday, so here is my mine.

Easyjet check-in staff member (honest)

"Has anyone put anything into your bag without your knowledge?"

I missed the plane thinking about that one.....
Have you orgasmed yet?

P

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Originally posted by shavixmir
Have you orgasmed yet?

Think the answer to that would depend if Will is an honest kid..

FB
Great Big Stees

In Check

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Originally posted by Amaurote
"Hello?"

I've never quite worked out how to answer that one.
I used to hear this before cell phones were around... Hi, where are you?

f
Diane

Nairn

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ok i work in car hire...and when booking out a hire car to someone we have to see the hirer's drivers licence to make sure they are eligable to actually drive the car...... fine ..so then why do so many renters ask if its ok for their wives/husbands/partners/work collegues to go on the hire without showing their licence ???

i

Felicific Forest

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On the phone: "Is that you?"

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