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How you can communicate with top players for fr...

How you can communicate with top players for fr...

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The title should say "for free"...

'Tis very simple. All you need is a plasma TV. For example, you are not sure what to do next to improve and want to ask Kasparov for advise. Sit in front of your plasma and TV and concentrate on his name. Make sure you have a clear image of his face in your mind, keep calling on him and he should be in your head in a matter of minutes. Keep your eyes closed at all times! After you are done conversing with him just open your eyes. Please ensure that you are, in fact, using a plasma TV. What ever you do, do NOT try it with a normal TV...the experience is not pleasant *shudders*

If you do not have a plasma TV, you can also communicate via a microwave...'twill be harder, but it should still work as long as you concentrate hard enough.

Well...what are you waiting for? Get of the internet and go try it...!

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Originally posted by Raven69
The title should say "for free"...

'Tis very simple. All you need is a plasma TV. For example, you are not sure what to do next to improve and want to ask Kasparov for advise. Sit in front of your plasma and TV and concentrate on his name. Make sure you have a clear image of his face in your mind, keep calling on him and he should be in your head in a mat ...[text shortened]... trate hard enough.

Well...what are you waiting for? Get of the internet and go try it...!
I don't have a TV or a microwave. 🙁 No wonder that I am playing crap! Any chance that it would work with a radio? Or maybe a washing machine?

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Originally posted by Nordlys
I don't have a TV or a microwave. 🙁 No wonder that I am playing crap! Any chance that it would work with a radio? Or maybe a washing machine?
I am not sure aboot a radio, a washing machine should still work though....give it a try and tell us how it went.

Remember to keep your eyes closed...!

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To communicate via micowave, does one need to sit infront of it, or put their head in it?
I put my head in mine and closed my eyes, but nothing happened.. perhaps I was'nt concentrated enough?
Please help

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Originally posted by TheAlien
To communicate via micowave, does one need to sit infront of it, or put their head in it?
I put my head in mine and closed my eyes, but nothing happened.. perhaps I was'nt concentrated enough?
Please help
Did you close the microwave door? It won't work unless the door is closed....

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Originally posted by Raven69
Did you close the microwave door? It won't work unless the door is closed....
I just tried talking with Kasparov and he said, "You know, this trick doesn't really work".

😞

If RHP doesn't start working properly again, I might just need to try another chess master.

P-

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I am fortunate enogh to have a great player as an IM contact. I hate to bother him though. 😕

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Originally posted by Raven69
The title should say "for free"...

'Tis very simple. All you need is a plasma TV. For example, you are not sure what to do next to improve and want to ask Kasparov for advise. Sit in front of your plasma and TV and concentrate on his name. Make sure you have a clear image of his face in your mind, keep calling on him and he should be in your head in a mat ...[text shortened]... trate hard enough.

Well...what are you waiting for? Get of the internet and go try it...!
What sort of drugs are you?
Can I have some?

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Originally posted by shavixmir
What sort of drugs are you?
Can I have some?
I'm pretty sure he's a crushed up baby aspirin... or perhaps a Flintstones chewable now that you ask.

P-

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Originally posted by Phlabibit
I'm pretty sure he's a crushed up baby aspirin... or perhaps a Flintstones chewable now that you ask.

P-
Flintstones are hard to kick, once the monkey is on your back. 😞

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Why are you all still here? You should be in front of your microwaves contacting great players! I know you are a bit skeptical, but you have to try it.....just stick your head in the microwave, close the door, and turn it on....simple as that.

And no, no one can have my drugs....they were a gift from my friend's husband's sister's roommate's cousin twice removed and have very great sentimental value to me...besides, if I gave them away, what would I feed my cacti?

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Originally posted by Ice Cold
I am fortunate enough to have a great player as an IM contact. I hate to bother him though. 😕
Thank you, but it's really no bother. 😵

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I just talked with Kasparov again, and his latest words of wisdom to me were: I'm sorry, I'm busy and can't talk right now.

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Originally posted by Raven69
The title should say "for free"...

'Tis very simple. All you need is a plasma TV. For example, you are not sure what to do next to improve and want to ask Kasparov for advise. Sit in front of your plasma and TV and concentrate on his name. Make sure you have a clear image of his face in your mind, keep calling on him and he should be in your head in a mat ...[text shortened]... trate hard enough.

Well...what are you waiting for? Get of the internet and go try it...!
What if I want to get in touch with, say, Genghis Khan or something because I want advice on acquiring or improving on some other skills? What appliance should I use?

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Originally posted by Arrakis
Thank you, but it's really no bother. 😵
That's good to know. 🙂