RBHill's God #2 - A tale of two young people

There was a young woman - let's call her Sheila. There was a young man - let's call him Bruce. Bruce decided to marry Sheila. Bruce shortly after decided that Sheila wasn't quite his cup of tea, so he went to the elders of his village and said that Sheila wasn't a virgin and he wanted a divorce. He had been misled into thinking that she was as pure as driven snow, and yet he discovered that she was sullied and dirty.

Much to Sheila's discomfiture, her parents pop inside the boudoir and bring out sheets which have blood on them. Oh horror, Bruce has been caught out lying to the elders of the village. His punishment? A fine of one hundred silver shekels and a good telling off AND he has to go back to Sheila and try and live with her happily ever after.

BUT

What happens if Sheila's parents couldn't find a bloody sheet? What happens if Sheila's hymen had been torn when she was eight years old when had been riding the old mule to market? What happens if Sheila had been raped prior to marriage? Or perhaps, what happens if Sheila had (shock horror) slept with a man prior to marriage?

No fines for her. No telling off. No having to live with Bruce happily ever after.

Nope, God the merciful decrees that she has to be stoned to death in front of her fathers' house.

But don''t take my word for it. You can find this juicy commandment from God at Deuteronomy 22:13-21

I once knew a girl who was pure as the driven snow. Then she started to drift! I tell ya,it ain't easy being me!😕

Good story. Did you use Coletti's e-Sword to dig this up?
I may have to check that out myself.

Originally posted by sundown316
I once knew a girl who was pure as the driven snow. Then she started to drift! I tell ya,it ain't easy being me!😕

Originally posted by chaswray
I once knew a girl named Virginia. We called her Virgin for short, but not for long🙄

I once knew a girl named Shaquonda
She drove an ugly red Honda
One day it broke down
In the wrong part of town
All tha brothaz came 'round to fondl'a

Dr. Cribs (unfortunately, not the author of this brilliant limmerick)

Originally posted by sundown316
I got no luck with women. Every time I meet a girl,she just turned over a new leaf. This girl told me to bring up a pint. I got ice cream.😕

Originally posted by Cribs
Good story. Did you use Coletti's e-Sword to dig this up?
I may have to check that out myself.