@drewnogal saidWe had just had the one.
Are they worth the cost?
She’s lovely, well she was lovely as a child, and fortunately decided to leave home and go her own way several years ago.
It was a blessed relief in many ways, but then there came other worries and expenses and objectionable types. I keep fit and find myself tempted to use my physical presence to slightly intimidate more avant-garde types. It’s not really effective nor does it pay back well.
So now I try to be cool and go with the flow.
As instructed.
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@drewnogal saidits 6 of one and half a dozen of the other, I have a girl & a boy, my son is not problematic, my daughter alas is never happy always wanting more out of life christmas day 2 years back she phoned from australia to tell us that they were divorcing, 3 of her adopted kids have gone of the railes( we love her) but she is a walking disaster area.
Are they worth the cost?
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15 Aug 21
@drewnogal saidit never happens
The going rate for raising one was said to be £20K in 1996. That must be far higher now?
The intermittent worries around them reaching independence are something else! I’ve become very selfish and think, ‘I’d just like my life back now please’.
15 Aug 21
@drewnogal saidDefinitely not selfish. When and if your kids will become independent is a big deal. If they don't, what happens as you age and after you have gone? Amazing how many families are struggling on with aging parents who are carers for non-independent kids. For example that aspect of living with disability still seems very hidden to me.
The going rate for raising one was said to be £20K in 1996. That must be far higher now?
The intermittent worries around them reaching independence are something else! I’ve become very selfish and think, ‘I’d just like my life back now please’.
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15 Aug 21
@torunn removed their quoted postyou can only do your best, my wife worked 3 jobs to help both our kids through uni .
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15 Aug 21
@drewnogal saidIn Canada they say it’s now between $10-15K a year. Can’t remember the cut off age. Parents teach their offspring what they’ve been taught, for the most part. If the “teachers” were not taught well by their “teachers”, there can be problems and often are. Most parents do the best they can with what they have. One is lucky if one gets a semblance of their life back but that’s just part of the “expense” of having children.
The going rate for raising one was said to be £20K in 1996. That must be far higher now?
The intermittent worries around them reaching independence are something else! I’ve become very selfish and think, ‘I’d just like my life back now please’.
Most of what I’ve just said sounds a bit...obvious, doesn’t it?🤔
15 Aug 21
@drewnogal saidYes, but only if you are going to bring them up properly and make them responsible, productive, independent adults, otherwise use contraceptives. Badly brought up kids become murderers, rapists, deranged sickos who terrorise society and their parents and relatives, and is a financial drain on the government scarce resources.
Are they worth the cost?
@rajk999 saidThere’s a deranged, now deceased, young man currently highlighting the UK news for a mass shooting. He may have been the baby of a mother with severe depression where nobody noticed how he was suffering neglect?
Yes, but only if you are going to bring them up properly and make them responsible, productive, independent adults, otherwise use contraceptives. Badly brought up kids become murderers, rapists, deranged sickos who terrorise society and their parents and relatives, and is a financial drain on the government scarce resources.