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Has the Rapture come and gone?

Has the Rapture come and gone?

Spirituality

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Originally posted by darvlay
dj2becker comes in as the clear favourite because he's young, abused consistently and there's only so much material on google he can cut and paste. 2:1

KellyJay's patience seems like a vast reservoir, but sooner or later the good times must end. I put him at 10:1

Coletti seems like he's here to stay. He gets along reasonably well with the other ...[text shortened]... tined to stay on Earth and rot with the rest of us, so they cannot possibly be raptured. 1000:1
WHERE DO YOU PUT THE CLOSET CHRISTIAN, NO1MARAUDER? WHILE HE DENIES BEING A BELIEVER, AS PSEUDO JESUS, I KNOW THAT HE PRAYS TO GOD EVERY NIGHT AS HE GETS A$$ RAPED IN HIS CELL. I KNOW HE TELLS EVERYONE HE'S A LAWYER, BUT, IN REALITY HE'S A PEDOPHILE SENTENCED TO LIFE IMPRISONMENT IN A FEDERAL PUMP ME IN THE A$$ PRISON.

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
WHERE DO YOU PUT THE CLOSET CHRISTIAN, NO1MARAUDER? WHILE HE DENIES BEING A BELIEVER, AS PSEUDO JESUS, I KNOW THAT HE PRAYS TO GOD EVERY NIGHT AS HE GETS A$$ RAPED IN HIS CELL. I KNOW HE TELLS EVERYONE HE'S A LAWYER, BUT, IN REALITY HE'S A PEDOPHILE SENTENCED TO LIFE IMPRISONMENT IN A FEDERAL PUMP ME IN THE A$$ PRISON.
I must say your Jesus impression is spot-on...

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Originally posted by darvlay
I must say your Jesus impression is spot-on...
IF I KNOW ANYTHING I KNOW MY JESUS.

PSEUDO JESUS OUT!

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
IF I KNOW ANYTHING I KNOW MY JESUS.

PSEUDO JESUS OUT!
How well do you know him? Is it true he doesn't eat M&M's because they fall through the holes in his hands?

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Originally posted by Moldy Crow
How well do you know him? Is it true he doesn't eat M&M's because they fall through the holes in his hands?
THAT'S A COMMON MISCONCEPTION, THE HOLES ARE IN HIS WRISTS AND HE DOESN'T NEED TO EAT ANYMORE ANYWAY. SCREW NOT WITH JESUS LEST HE SCREW UNTO YOU.

PSEUDO JESUS OUT!

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
THAT'S A COMMON MISCONCEPTION, THE HOLES ARE IN HIS WRISTS AND HE DOESN'T NEED TO EAT ANYMORE ANYWAY. SCREW NOT WITH JESUS LEST HE SCREW UNTO YOU.

PSEUDO JESUS OUT!
OK , on easter we go to sunrise service and reenact the stone being rolled away from the tomb and the subsequent emergance of the corpse/savoir guy . Fine , I got that . But at what point does he see or not see his shadow and proclaim whether there'll be 6 more weeks of winter?

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
PERHAPS THIS IS HELL, JUST NOT AS HOT AS PROMISED AND WITH FEWER PITCHFORKS.... AS ETERNAL DAMNATION GOES THIS AIN'T SO BAD... EXCEPT WE'VE GOT TO PUT UP WITH NON-SUBSCRIBER RIFF RAFF.

PSEUDO JESUS OUT!
No comment

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Originally posted by Moldy Crow
OK , on easter we go to sunrise service and reenact the stone being rolled away from the tomb and the subsequent emergance of the corpse/savoir guy . Fine , I got that . But at what point does he see or not see his shadow and proclaim whether there'll be 6 more weeks of winter?
JESUS WAS TRYING TO MAKE IT OUT TO CATCH UP WITH THE MARDI GRAS CELEBRATIONS. WITH THAT WATER TO WINE TRICK JESUS WAS AND IS A PARTY ANIMAL. JESUS SPENDS A LOT OF TIME IN NEW ORLEANS AROUND ABOUT JAZZ FEST AND HE LOVES TO KICK IT UP A NOTCH WITH EMERIL.

BAM! PSEUDO JESUS OUT!

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Originally posted by frogstomp
No comment
COME ON NOW, THIS THREAD IS BEGGING FOR IT!

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(I'm halfway up the hill...your voice is very soft, pseudo-Jesus...how about some help pushing this rock?)

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Originally posted by darvlay
dj2becker comes in as the clear favourite because he's young, abused consistently and there's only so much material on google he can cut and paste. 2:1

KellyJay's patience seems like a vast reservoir, but sooner or later the good times must end. I put him at 10:1

Coletti seems like he's here to stay. He gets along reasonably well with the other ...[text shortened]... tined to stay on Earth and rot with the rest of us, so they cannot possibly be raptured. 1000:1
You could put chinking at even odds

1 edit
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Originally posted by Bosse de Nage
(I'm halfway up the hill...your voice is very soft, pseudo-Jesus...how about some help pushing this rock?)
WELL I SUPPOSE I COULD SEND DARV TO MOTIVATE YOU WITH A PITCHFORK.

edit: PSEUDO JESUS OUT!

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
WELL I SUPPOSE I COULD SEND DARV TO MOTIVATE YOU WITH A PITCHFORK.

edit: PSEUDO JESUS OUT!
No need. These funny little chaps just turned up and asked if they could have my rock. I couldn't place the accent, sounded a bit like Bjork.

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
COME ON NOW, THIS THREAD IS BEGGING FOR IT!
OK , tell us - was Mary M an animal in the sack or what ? I mean , after you saved her from that mob she must have thought you could walk on water ! She had to have been on you like a coyote on a pork chop !

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Originally posted by Moldy Crow
OK , tell us - was Mary M an animal in the sack or what ? I mean , after you saved her from that mob she must have thought you could walk on water ! She had to have been on you like a coyote on a pork chop !
LET'S PUT IT THIS WAY, SHE WAS REALLY INTO THE FATHER, THE SON AND THE HOLY GHOST TAG TEAM ACTION.