1. Standard memberapathist
    looking for loot
    western colorado
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    19 Sep '17 20:58
    I'm autistic and am used to trying to puzzle out what is apparently normal human stuff. Love is important and complicated, I figured that out by myself, thank you very much.

    I don't know where to start. You've heard of 'love at first sight', but you know that is stupid. Lust at first sight maybe. But then again we love to lust, right?

    Familiarity breeds contempt I've heard, and that from a culture that tries to enforce monogamy on us! From teenage hot love to octogenarians married forever, from spaghetti to sunsets, wtf is love.
  2. Joined
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    19 Sep '17 21:10
    Baby...
  3. Standard membervivify
    rain
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    20 Sep '17 02:311 edit
    *head nod*
  4. Standard memberdj2becker
    Tiger's ghost
    Shetland cemetery
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    20 Sep '17 04:00
    Originally posted by @apathist
    I'm autistic and am used to trying to puzzle out what is apparently normal human stuff. Love is important and complicated, I figured that out by myself, thank you very much.

    I don't know where to start. You've heard of 'love at first sight', but you know that is stupid. Lust at first sight maybe. But then again we love to lust, right?

    Familiarity br ...[text shortened]... From teenage hot love to octogenarians married forever, from spaghetti to sunsets, wtf is love.
    https://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2015/07/20/love-is-a-choice-more-than-a-feeling/
  5. Standard memberblack beetle
    Black Beastie
    Scheveningen
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    20 Sep '17 06:49
    Originally posted by @apathist
    I'm autistic and am used to trying to puzzle out what is apparently normal human stuff. Love is important and complicated, I figured that out by myself, thank you very much.

    I don't know where to start. You've heard of 'love at first sight', but you know that is stupid. Lust at first sight maybe. But then again we love to lust, right?

    Familiarity br ...[text shortened]... From teenage hot love to octogenarians married forever, from spaghetti to sunsets, wtf is love.
    Direct experience. Deep loving kindness, compassion; appreciative joy; no clinging; no lust; no confusion; no neediness; no fear; no ego grasping. Love is strengthened through practice.

    Under those circumstances, when your love is directed to a person: Would you die for the one you love? Would the one you love die for you? If positive, your bond is strong;
    And, when your love is boundless, then what? To love under optimal conditions is not love; how easy to “love your neighbor” and to “turn the other cheek” in the abstract –and what a challenge to do so herenow when you deal with the real thing. Once you cultivate a genuine expression of boundless love day in day out, you follow the path to your liberation;


    The above is just a fishnet; once you catch the fish, discard it
    😵
  6. Joined
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    20 Sep '17 08:24
    Apathist, in reply to your PM, here are some further musings of mine on the subject of "Love - What Is It?"

    I hope this will my initial post more understandable.

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me
    No more
    What is love?
    Yeah

    I don't know why you're not fair
    I give you my love, but you don't care
    So what is right and what is wrong?
    Gimme a sign

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    Oh, I don't know, what can I do?
    What else can I say, it's up to you
    I know we're one, just me and you
    I can't go on

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    What is love?
    What is love?
    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more
    Don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me

    I want no other, no other lover
    This is our life, our time
    We are together I need you forever
    Is it love?

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    Yeah, yeah, (woah-woah-woah, oh, oh)
    (Woah-woah-woah, oh, oh)

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more
    What is love?
  7. SubscriberFMF
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    This Thread
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    20 Sep '17 08:42
    Originally posted by @dj2becker
    https://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2015/07/20/love-is-a-choice-more-than-a-feeling/
    It's an interesting 2 minute read. However, its title is quite misleading. It's called "Love is a Choice More than a Feeling". It probably should have been called something like "Relationships Need Commitment and Work".
  8. Standard memberdj2becker
    Tiger's ghost
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    20 Sep '17 09:17
    Originally posted by @fmf
    It's an interesting 2 minute read. However, its title is quite misleading. It's called "Love is a Choice More than a Feeling". It probably should have been called something like "Relationships Need Commitment and Work".
    Relationships that are built upon love yeah?
  9. Joined
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    20 Sep '17 10:01
    Originally posted by @great-king-rat
    Apathist, in reply to your PM, here are some further musings of mine on the subject of "Love - What Is It?"

    I hope this will my initial post more understandable.

    What is love?
    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me
    No more
    What is love?
    Yeah

    I don't know why you're not fair
    I give you my love, bu ...[text shortened]... n't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more

    Baby don't hurt me
    Don't hurt me
    No more
    What is love?
    (Head bobbing sideways repeatedly)

    Wanna dance, wanna dance, wanna dance?
  10. Joined
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    20 Sep '17 10:03
    Originally posted by @apathist
    I'm autistic and am used to trying to puzzle out what is apparently normal human stuff. Love is important and complicated, I figured that out by myself, thank you very much.

    I don't know where to start. You've heard of 'love at first sight', but you know that is stupid. Lust at first sight maybe. But then again we love to lust, right?

    Familiarity br ...[text shortened]... From teenage hot love to octogenarians married forever, from spaghetti to sunsets, wtf is love.
    As I've said, the English language does a piss poor job trying to define what love is. The Greeks did a much better job.

    Definitions of Greeks Words for Love:

    Agapeo: Unconditional love; the love of God in the renewed mind in manifestation
    Phileo: Love between friends
    Eros: The sense of being in love; romantic love
    Storge: Love of family; Parent/child, siblings, cousins, etc. In a very close family, agape is felt as well.
  11. Standard memberdj2becker
    Tiger's ghost
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    20 Sep '17 10:10
    Originally posted by @whodey
    As I've said, the English language does a piss poor job trying to define what love is. The Greeks did a much better job.

    Definitions of Greeks Words for Love:

    Agapeo: Unconditional love; the love of God in the renewed mind in manifestation
    Phileo: Love between friends
    Eros: The sense of being in love; romantic love
    Storge: Love of family; Parent/child, siblings, cousins, etc. In a very close family, agape is felt as well.
    The atheist cannot understand agape because they conflate it with eros.
  12. Joined
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    20 Sep '17 10:26
    Originally posted by @whodey
    As I've said, the English language does a piss poor job trying to define what love is. The Greeks did a much better job.

    Definitions of Greeks Words for Love:

    Agapeo: Unconditional love; the love of God in the renewed mind in manifestation
    Phileo: Love between friends
    Eros: The sense of being in love; romantic love
    Storge: Love of family; Parent/child, siblings, cousins, etc. In a very close family, agape is felt as well.
    These definitions of "love" all use the word "love" to define "love" :/

    Talk about a "piss poor job".
  13. Standard memberblack beetle
    Black Beastie
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    20 Sep '17 11:05
    Originally posted by @whodey
    As I've said, the English language does a piss poor job trying to define what love is. The Greeks did a much better job.

    Definitions of Greeks Words for Love:

    Agapeo: Unconditional love; the love of God in the renewed mind in manifestation
    Phileo: Love between friends
    Eros: The sense of being in love; romantic love
    Storge: Love of family; Parent/child, siblings, cousins, etc. In a very close family, agape is felt as well.
    I want to keep it simple assuming you merely ended up a bit stranded whilst struggling to cope with Greek (my apologies apathist, I know the thread derails from your OP).
    Here you go whodey -my translation of the expert I submit ref. 1a, 1b and 2a. Source link: http://www.greek-language.gr/greekLang/modern_greek/tools/lexica/triantafyllides/search.html?lq=%CE%B1%CE%B3%CE%AC%CF%80%CE%B7&dq=

    agápi i [agápi]: 1a.state of a natural feel where the person feels friendship, affection, sympathy, tenderness, devotion. 1b. erotic feeling. 2a. (theol.) agápi for G-d and our fellowman.

    That being said, as regards 2.a, the Orthodox approach is the following: Paul feels agapi deep down (Gal. 2:20) and he comments so in B’ Cor. 13:11 –this feeling is also mentioned at A’ John 4:8– on a basis that extends from one’s love for G-d to Jesus’ love for all the humanity, and from there enters the concrete knowledge of G-d’s love “en Christo” (in Christ), evident at Rom. 5:5, 5:8 and 8:39.

    Now what, whodey?

    😵
  14. Standard memberblack beetle
    Black Beastie
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    20 Sep '17 11:05
    Originally posted by @dj2becker
    The atheist cannot understand agape because they conflate it with eros.
    Seriously?
    😵
  15. SubscriberGhost of a Duke
    A Spirited Misfit
    in London
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    20 Sep '17 11:15
    Originally posted by @black-beetle
    Seriously?
    😵
    It makes it easier for him to sleep at night if he tells himself that.
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