Originally posted by homedepotovthat would be deciding who their freinds are, not just knowing who they are (IMO)
People do need to be more engaged in their kid's lives and show them that they care, but at the same time you don't want to be a "helicopter mum" who hovers protectively over them 24/7, preventing them from making mistakes and developing trust in their own ability to handle problems. That can smother their need for independence and make them bitter. I th ...[text shortened]... loosen the reins a bit and give them more and more freedom. You don't want to smother them.
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Originally posted by yo its meit's hard to say what went on without knowing anything about the people involved, anything is possible.
Perhaps you're right, I don't know. The reason why I thought she'd been deceived about him is that he's not been straight with the ploice and seams to have plenty of alias'.
In anycase her parents should have been more nosey. I don't have a problme with being nosey in my kids lives, I'm going to be very nosey as they get older, I'll want to meet all t ...[text shortened]... embarrassing to have a nosey mum, better that then one who dosen't take an interest.
so lets say you see our 17 year old daughter on the internet... you walk up to her and ask 'what are you doing?' she says that she's talking with a friend, you ask who, she replies 'just a friend' you say 'a boy?' 'maybe' she says. then what do you do?
i remember being 17, it's not that long ago, if my mum was half as nosey about my life at 17, or anytime, i wouldn't be half as close to her than i am now...
trying to be close to someone you often find that you push them away, especially teenagers. plus the more questions you ask the more likelihood there is that she will lie in response to make you go away.
if i have kids i'll be teaching them common sense, to trust their judgment what i won't be doing is poking my nose in at everything they do... especially as they get older. if you show that you trust them they will be more likely to open up and talk about things, that's what i would what. a daughter or son who felt they could talk to me about anything without me judging or trying to path out their night or life for them.
Originally posted by trev33You're making sense, I agree. I don't want to be pushy by any means. I do trust that I'm giving them all a good solid safe home where they can air anything they want to. I certianly don't want to ruin that.
it's hard to say what went on without knowing anything about the people involved, anything is possible.
so lets say you see our 17 year old daughter on the internet... you walk up to her and ask 'what are you doing?' she says that she's talking with a friend, you ask who, she replies 'just a friend' you say 'a boy?' 'maybe' she says. then what do you do? ...[text shortened]... t anything without me judging or trying to path out their night or life for them.
Taking your sinario; I'd say something, so she knew I'd notcied she's talking on the net with someone I don't know. Then later I'd bring it up, just to ask in an interested way. I'd keep an eye, maybe tell her dad I'd noticed her chatting. One thing I will defenetly do is make the laptop stay in an area where they're not in a closed room chatting.
Originally posted by SMSBear716Maybe they should waterboard him. Chenney says it's ok.
Unfortunately, its very sad. Hopefully if the guy is guilty, they fry him (personally I think he should be tortured to death but they say such things are cruel and unusual, no one seems to care what was done to the vicitm though.)
On another note, one has to wonder about the mentality of the people who meet with strangers they chat with on the InterWeb ...[text shortened]... You'd think other people, especially teenagers would learn from the tragic mistakes of others.
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Originally posted by trev33Absolutely. My oldest is only 19 months now and I'm trying my best to let her be as independent as possible.
if i have kids i'll be teaching them common sense, to trust their judgment what i won't be doing is poking my nose in at everything they do... especially as they get older. if you show that you trust them they will be more likely to open up and talk about things, that's what i would what. a daughter or son who felt they could talk to me about anything without me judging or trying to path out their night or life for them.
It drives my wife crazy sometimes, but I believe she needs to scuff the odd knee in an effort to climb the step into the kitchen from outside.
By making mistakes we learn.
Anyway, why is there such a big hoopla over this? So a possibly crazy predator struck, it happens all the time and unfortunately nothing can be done about these people with the odd screw loose. We can only catch them after the deed is done.
I get much more pissed off when I read of a teenager who was killed by a drunk driver while she was being driven to piano class by her mom...
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Originally posted by darvlayAre you saying that even apart from the morbid obesity and acne scars, young Crowley also developed a virtual Alabama Hot Pocket fetish?
MORE HOT POCKETS!
Or are you just projecting an image of poor little Crowley sitting at his computer, trying to type with the chubby little fingers of his left hand, shouting at his poor mother for something to eat as he's too socially disfunctional to come down stairs to dinner?
I'm reappraising my attitude towards my kids and the internet with the FACTs I'm learning here tonight.
D
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Originally posted by RagnorakIf it wasn't the latter before, it is now.
Are you saying that even apart from the morbid obesity and acne scars, young Crowley also developed a virtual Alabama Hot Pocket fetish?
Or are you just projecting an image of poor little Crowley sitting at his computer, trying to type with the chubby little fingers of his left hand, shouting at his poor mother for something to eat as he's too socially g my attitude towards my kids and the internet with the FACTs I'm learning here tonight.
D
http://tinyurl.com/yjc8mlh