Best Homer Simpson lines

Originally posted by uzless
A ralphism...


Ralph (To a wolf): Will you be my mommy? You smell like dead bunnies...

Homer: there are three ways to do things. The right way the wrong way and the max power way
Bart: isn't that just the wrong way
Homer: ya but faster

Doh!

To alchohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of lifes problems.

Originally posted by PocketKings
To alchohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of lifes problems.

Homer: So I want the monogram to read "M-A-X P-O-W ... "
Employee: Sir, traditionally, a monogram is just initials.
Homer: Max Power doesn't abbreviate. Each letter is as important as the one that preceded it. Maybe more important! No, as important.

Simpson! Homer Simpson! He's the greatest guy in history. From the, town of Springfield! He's about to hit a chestnut tree!

That guy impressed me and I'm not easily impressed. Wow! A blue car!


Homer: Not a bear in sight. The bear patrol must be working like a charm.
Lisa: That's specious logic, Dad.
H: Thank you, honey.
L: By your logic, I could claim that this rock keeps tigers away.
H: How does it work?
L: It doesn't work.
H: Uh-huh.
L: It's just a stupid rock.
H: Uh-huh.
L: But I don't see any tigers around here, do you?
H: (after thoughtful pause) Lisa, I want to buy your rock.

Homer: Yeah, good things don't end with 'eum', they end with 'mania' or 'teria'.

To Bart: Butter your bacon, boy.

To Marge: I'd kill for you, Marge. Please ask me to kill for you.

To his imagination: Stupid sexy Flanders!

(Marge to homer): Homer, you don't have to pray outloud.
Homer: But he's way the hell up there!

Also one of my favs was where homer attempts to take a lie detector test. but can't quite recall the entire quote.

all the maxpower ones are great. That was the best episode in my opinion

I cant remember the whole conversation but homer is in a gun store and the guy tells him he has to wait three days for the security check and homer says.

"I would shoot you if I had my gun"

"the two greatest words in the English language.....default."

Originally posted by uzless
"I hear they have the internet on computers now"

"All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer."

I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals FLAMMMING!!!