I've been having a discussion with someone I'm playing about when it is appropriate to chat in a game. The situation was that we were having two tight games and there had been no chatting in either until I won the first and chatted in the second to say well played etc.
My opponent seemed to take offence that I had waited so long to chat.
Looking at the conversation below (where I'll admit I'm a little glib in my last post), is my opponent being over-sensitive or is he right and I'm being rude by waiting so long to chat?
I need to know as I frequently comment on good moves or good games and would hate to think I'm offending people by not starting the conversation early enough.
jonnyt (move 40 - but quite a way to go yet)
hey, enjoyed both our games. will look out for you in further tounaments. think i'll find it rather difficult to win this one and progress in the tounament...
opponent
OMG!! YOU SPEAK ENGLISH??!! Why did you choose to chat now??!!
jonnyt
My flag shows I'm British, are you being sarcastic? Unless I'm mistaken, you haven't chatted once in either of our games either. I won't bother again.
opponent
So, that does not mean anything. In case you did not know, the flag represents where you were born. Haha, very funny!! You started playing without saying one word!! So, I thought you either did not speak English or hated chatting like most people on here!!
jonnyt
You haven't sent one single message to me either! Until I sent a polite message saying I enjoyed our game and you decided to respond by being rude. How on earth can you be angry with me for not messaging when I was the one who sent the first message?!? I like to chat throughout games, I just assumed you didn't.
opponent
I GAVE YOU A CHANCE TO CHAT AND YOU NEVER SAID ONE WORD!! YOU MADE THE FIRST MOVE AND DID NOT SAY ONE SINGLE WORD!! Yeah right!! If you liked chatting throughout the games, you would have said something when you made the first move!! So, apparently, you did not like chatting at all!! So, I was not being rude by asking you why you wanted to chat when the game was almost done!! What is the use of chatting when the game is almost done??!! And like I said, I thought you either did not speak English or you hated chatting like most other people on here.
jonnyt
And I gave you a chance to chat in the game you moved first, why did you not say anything then? I have played many games here and some I have chatted throughout, some I have said "Good move" during the game and some just "Good game" at the end but during all these games, I have never met anyone on this site as rude as you. All I did was tell you I had enjoyed our game. How was I to know that you have some ridiculous rule where if a person does not chat on his first move, he is not allowed to chat at all?
opponent
Can't you read??!! I told you that YOU made the first moves in our games!! I THOUGHT SINCE YOU HATED CHATTING OR COULD NOT SPEAK ENGLISH, I THOUGHT YOU DID NOT WANT TO CHAT!! Yeah, sure, like I believe you when you did not even say ONE WORD??!! Oh whoopie doo about the gg. So what??!! IF YOU DON'T CHAT FROM THE VERY START, DON'T CHAT AT ALL, ESPECIALLY WHEN THE GAME IS ALMOST DONE!! After all, what is the use of chatting if the game is almost over, huh?? LOL Me rude??!! First of all, I was NOT being rude in asking my question. Second of all, it made me wonder and think why the person wants to chat when the game is almost done.
jonnyt
What is it you find so hard to understand? In game 4605195, YOU made the first move and YOU did not chat. Can you please explain that, seeing as you think it is incredibly wrong not to say hi at the start of every game? You are the only person on this entire site who thinks that it is only ok to chat if you do so on the first move. And you are the only person on this site who doesn't think it is rude to abuse someone who simply says they enjoyed playing a game with you. Show our conversation to anyone you know, and see if you can find a single person who thinks I am in the wrong for simply telling you I enjoyed our game.
opponent
Uh, YOU MADE THE FIRST MOVE IN THE MATCH AND YOU DID NOT EVEN SAY ONE WORD!! I NEVER said it was wrong not to say hi at the start of every game!! Uh, no, I NEVER SAID IT WAS NOT RUDE TO ABUSE SOMEONE!! LEARN TO READ BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING!! i NEVER said you were wrong in saying you enjoyed the game. I was just shocked as to why you would want to say anything when you NEVER SAID ONE WORD THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE GAME!!
jonnyt
I can see that you obviously have something wrong with you, maybe a mental problem, so I think we should stop talking now. If you feel you really can't stop sending me incoherent messages, could you at least please learn how to use the Caps Lock key? Maybe you could practice some basic grammar as well?
opponent
LMAO!! Haha, very funny. Actually, you are the one with the mental problem!! Damn, you can't even say things correctly at all!! How can we talk when we don't even hear each other's voices??!! I can say the same thing about you. Learn to type correctly and use correct grammar!! At least, my grammar is much better than yours is.
By now, I have realised we are probably not going to agree but he has me wondering what other people think.
Originally posted by jonnytI think it simply manifests the old adage that nobody can reason with a person who's mind has closed. It is a total waste of time and effort. You can always tell when people are completely in the wrong, they will attack you. My advice would be to put it behind you and forget it. Your charming opponent will have to wake up tomorrow and find that he/she is still the same obnoxious person. Why would you want to have any further conversation with such a one?
I've been having a discussion with someone I'm playing about when it is appropriate to chat in a game. The situation was that we were having two tight games and there had been no chatting in either until I won the first and chatted in the second to say well played etc.
My opponent seemed to take offence that I had waited so long to chat.
Looking at the conv ...[text shortened]... bly not going to agree but he has me wondering what other people think.
I'd agree with all that has been said above.
One point: I prefer in-game chat and indicate that in my profile. I do NOT like it when I play a stranger who says nothing for 40 moves, then makes a comment (any comment) when I am under pressure, clearly with a view to putting me off my game and causing me to miss something important! I certainly would not have responded that way, though, I'd have just said no more in that game.
Prime example of putting two humans together and observing how it bursts into flames.
You both could have offered a friendly word or too at the start of your games and none of this would have happened.
I myself like to greet my opponent in their mother tongue and offer cake recipes.
The geeky ignorance you have both displayed is being printed off and stuck on my wall at work so everyone can have a bloody good laugh at you both.
(If the above has easily offended you then stay away from human interaction as it is not your thing, you have both managed to create a bad situation from nothing)
Edit: I forgot to say, I hate you.
Edit 2: I don't just hate you, but all you not chatting freaks (if you come up to me in the street and produce a chessboard and start playing chess without even a "hello" or something, then you are going to get a mouthful my friend).
Edit 3: Good day Sir.
Cheers
🙄
Originally posted by NordlysI bet in their household, they just grunt when tea and cake is offered to them.
I almost sent you a challenge, then I noticed you had said "recipes". How disappointing. 🙁
Damn rude the pair of them, I thinkssss they should both be banned (forever).
The new office joke is going down well though, I am becoming quite popular for bringing this entertainment to the workplace.
😀
Originally posted by WoodgieYou'd become even more popular if you'd offer them cake.
I bet in their household, they just grunt when tea and cake is offered to them.
Damn rude the pair of them, I thinkssss they should both be banned (forever).
The new office joke is going down well though, I am becoming quite popular for bringing this entertainment to the workplace.
😀