23 Jun 05
Many of you have come to me privately to request the benefit of my infinte wisdom. We have many know-it-alls on this site, but, it is evident that many of you are in dire need of my advice... or, at my discretion, a good slap up the side of the head with a haddock.
For a limited time only, I am offering my services to help you with all manner of questions and concerns be they social, spiritual or sexual.
Act fast as the introductory fee of a mere $1.53US per question will not last for long. Please keep your inquiries to under 200 words in length... no need to drivel on.
23 Jun 05
Originally posted by Joe FistDear Tastes Like Chicken,
Um, okay? You know of a great sushi bar in San Francisco? The check is in the mail upon receipt of slap to noggin. 😛
During my one trip to San Fran I dined at a place called Anzu. Exceptional food all the way round. The head waitress was a STUNNING asian/euro mix with deafening eyes and a body to die for. Yum.
I don't recall where it is and could be bothered looking it up. Plus, I had to be poured into a cab being blitzed on 5 different types of Saki. I'm lucky I made it to the hotel room.
Good Fisting.
Regards,
The Hand.
23 Jun 05
Originally posted by SiskinDear Slap Happy,
a slap on the side of the head with a haddock for only $1.53, that's got to be a bargain
You're a special case and in dire need of a good beating with fish. I'll give you a special ed discount... no charge for the first good slap.
Respectfully,
The Hand
23 Jun 05
Originally posted by Hand of HecateYou the man, Hand!!!!
Dear Tastes Like Chicken,
During my one trip to San Fran I dined at a place called Anzu. Exceptional food all the way round. The head waitress was a STUNNING asian/euro mix with deafening eyes and a body to die for. Yum.
I don't recall where it is and could be bothered looking it up. Plus, I had to be poured into a cab being blitzed on 5 di ...[text shortened]... es of Saki. I'm lucky I made it to the hotel room.
Good Fisting.
Regards,
The Hand.
I look forward to the headslap 🙂
23 Jun 05
Originally posted by dfm65Dear Fancy Pants,
Dear HoH,
what is the most fashionable and exciting way to fold napkins for a dinner party with work colleagues?
Thrillseeker
I'm glad you asked as I have the ideal solution for you. First you will need good quality, heavy cloth napkins, moderately starched, for best results. It takes just a series of simple tuck and folds to fashion said napkin into the splitting image of a large erect phallus and testicles. A large upthrust cawk and balls looming out of your dinner plate is certainly going to break the ice and start robust conversation. As an added special touch you may want to use flesh colored napkins and get a narrow napkin holder as a cawk ring.
Bow before my wisdom,
The Hand.