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Joke of the year.

Joke of the year.

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B'dum-TISH!

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Originally posted by dottewell
B'dum-TISH!
I know you`re out there I can hear you breathing

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Originally posted by Chakan
I know you`re out there I can hear you breathing
Get it? A parrot, a carrot!

Ha ha ha ha ha!

I am available for children's parties, BTW.

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Originally posted by Favs
Carrot.
Only if you are half deaf. I still say it's an orange penguinpuffin.

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"What's this - it hangs on the wall, is green, and whistles?"
"I have no idea."
"A herring!"
"What? But a herring doesn't hang on the wall??"
"Well, you can put it there."
"But it's not green either!"
"You can paint it."
"Okay... But it certainly doesn't whistle!"
"So what?"

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Originally posted by sjeg
ok...

on previous theme, what time is bedtime in Michael Jackson's house?












It's when the big hand touches the little hand.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?





One is a pale , thin , plastic thing which is dangerous for children to play with . You put your groceries in the other.

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Stephen Fry (as headmaster): Don't pick your nose, boy!
Hugh Laurie (as schoolboy) (indignantly): I'm not, sir!
SF: No, just a piece of general advice for the future...

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Originally posted by mosquitorespect
Stephen Fry (as headmaster): Don't pick your nose, boy!
Hugh Laurie (as schoolboy) (indignantly): I'm not, sir!
SF: No, just a piece of general advice for the future...
Whats green has 28 legs, 3 heads and speaks funny?

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Originally posted by darvlay
These jokes are about as funny as a back alley abortion clinic.
Lol. Abortion, ahh yes, only you could think of that 🙂.

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Originally posted by adramforall
Whats green has 28 legs, 3 heads and speaks funny?
George W Bush's imaginary friend: Bob

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Originally posted by adramforall
Whats green has 28 legs, 3 heads and speaks funny?
3 french people eating 11 frogs.

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WHY YELLING AT A MAN DOESN'T WORK

What a woman says

"This place is a mess! C'mon!
You and I need to clean it up!
Your stuff is lying on the floor and
you'll have no clothes to wear if we
don't do laundry right now!"

What a man hears:
blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON
blah, blah, blah, blah, YOU AND I
blah, blah, blah, blah, ON THE FLOOR
blah, blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES
blah, blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW!

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Q. Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men?
A. He thought it was a delivery service.

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Why did the checken cross the road?
To get to the other side.

Why did the dog cross the road?
'Cuase it was stapled to the chicken.

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Prophet Muhammed, Noah and Jesus were at a relgious convention discussing 'the spirititual way forward'. One evening, at the hotel during a break in the proceedings, they decided to go for a swim in the hotel pool. There was no water in the pool. The hotel manager explained 'it's a magic pool. Go to the diving board, wish for what you want in the pool and dive.' Noah goes to the diving board, bounces up and down, and says 'red wine'. The pool fills with red wine and he dives in. Jesus goes, bounces up and down and says 'white wine'. The pool fills with white wine and he dives in. Prophet Muhammed goes, bounces up and down and slips. He screams 'Oh! sh!t.....'
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