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Originally posted by yo its meIt all depends on how anything said gets counterbalanced. You could say "I love yout" countless times and not mean it or fail to live up to the wrods. Taking excess umbrage at what others say to the extent of overreacting by lashing out physically is evidence of childishness. It's like killing someone because they looked at you askance.
What about what parents say or don't say to their children. Or say to eachother infrount of their children. It's foolish to say words don't hurt. If you love someone then what they say matters. If not, then that's something different.
I never said words cannot be painful. What I am saying is that equating emotional pain to physical pain is simply not possible. Trev33 says he'd rather get kicked in the crotch than hear certain painful things. Me, I'd rather hear something painful and deal with it than be oblivious to what is going on. We have become truly thin skinned, weak and avoidant of all pain. All children get exposed to some form of pain or other whether in school, by their parents, peers, etc. How do you become resilient unless you have some exposure to pain?
Lastly, those who love us can get away with saying certain things simply because we allow those we love latitude to say things we would not take from others.
Originally posted by scacchipazzoEquating emotional pain to physical pain is simply not possible.
It all depends on how anything said gets counterbalanced. You could say "I love yout" countless times and not mean it or fail to live up to the wrods. Taking excess umbrage at what others say to the extent of overreacting by lashing out physically is evidence of childishness. It's like killing someone because they looked at you askance.
I never said ...[text shortened]... simply because we allow those we love latitude to say things we would not take from others.
Yes it is, they both hurt and one can recover from both by forgiving the offender.
Me, I'd rather hear something painful and deal with it than be oblivious to what is going on.
I'm going to agree with you for the second time 😲
How do you become resilient unless you have some exposure to pain?
It's not having survived the pain but how well one has survived and if one suffers emotional pain at a really young age it's posibale to never recover (and join the adult world). Maybe this is more opnion then fact mind you.
Those who love us can get away with saying certain things simply because we allow those we love latitude to say things we would not take from others.
That's becasue it's said in love. but if someone you love says somehting in hate, even if they applogise after the damage is done and you get hurt.
Originally posted by trev33Or pitying them, thus the popularity of Jerry Springer (as well as Judge Judy, et al) and the like.
"Self-importance is our greatest enemy. Think about it - what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellowmen. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone."
-Carlos Castaneda
"Dang, Margaret, at least we're not as bad off as those yahoos!"
Originally posted by Very RustyOnly if you let it fester. People dwell on things too much, too long. Perhaps you mean things said when a person is of an impressionable age. Otherwise, if you have a decent foundation you become impervious to long term effects from words regardless of how painful these may be at the moment when uttered. i firmly believe the touchy feely crowd wants it where you are unable to overcome words because it keeps the thought police in business.
A kick in the crotch although painful doesn't have a lasting affect.
Words on the other hand especially said by someone you love deeply or care about can cut deep and remain with you for years.