Teenage

Originally posted by pinnedhorse
Is it unusual for a 13 yr old boy not to hae a first kiss? Is it also the they have had no girlfriend yet??

My friend is like that.....

i need to find a solution

A 13 yo is best off not thinking about girls. They will have enough of that strife when they get older. Buy him some computer games, role-playing books and a porno mag and all will be fine.

Originally posted by pinnedhorse
yeh, but this guy is me........just covering up.


other boys get kissed, why not me
they go out with girls why not me
they hold hands why not me
they talk all the time why not me

WHY NOT ME!!!!???😠

I wouldn't worry about it. You can get to where you are trying too hard, and the girls will run a mile.
Be natural, be yourself (unless you are a nasty little toe-rag), and be patient.
You have no rush to burden yourself with the troubles of girls.

Originally posted by pinnedhorse
so ur saying, just be myself and i will score?😲😛 ........

i dont know if they dont like me or im just ugly

i just want a girl to talk to.......if u know what i mean.....a girl that knows me.....am i to desperate or is this a promblem???😳

It's certainly not unusual.
Here's the thing.
Girls mature faster than boys.
13 yo girls don't want to go out with 13 yo boys because they see them as immature.
You can be too desperate and this will turn the girls off. It is easy to see girls as some kind of separate species when you are 13 (and indeed they often nearly are at that age), and that trying to score is like a game you have to win.

Originally posted by pinnedhorse
so ur saying, just be myself and i will score?😲😛 ........

i dont know if they dont like me or im just ugly

i just want a girl to talk to.......if u know what i mean.....a girl that knows me.....am i to desperate or is this a promblem???😳

Let me sum it up for you:

Part I:

How to impress girls

Introduction:
Often as I read the forums (or fora as they may happen to be called), in between bouts of serious chess playing, I stumble across the occasional plea for help. Many along the lines of: “Is dating good?” and “How should I behave when…”. So, being the proper little behavioural expert I am, I’ve written a manual for all you young men (obviously a lot of you older boys need a helping hand as well, for surely your own hand is by now tiring…from all the mouse-action on the chessboard…I’m sure) on how to behave from the first date onwards.
You can mail me your thanks in 200$ checks. No refunds available, I’m afraid.

Hygiene:
I once held a job interview and the character sitting opposite me had snot dripping down his face. This is not how you go about selling yourself.

Men often underestimate the importance of hygiene to women. Let me prove it: Do women fancy Aragorn or Legolas?
There you go! They fancy Legolas, I’ll let you in on a wee secret: It’s not because of his pointy ears. No! It’s because he has clean finger nails.
SHOWER. Yes, you do smell after 24 hours if you don’t shower.

Brush your teeth. Your breath does smell like a dog’s arse. Seriously, it does. Brush ‘m. Spend at least 3 minutes brushing them and your tongue. Brushing your tongue gets rid of bad breath.

Just in case you do get lucky, and believe me: if you have to rely on my help then the chances are not in your favour, wash your privates. There’s nothing like an unhealthy dose of smegma to ruin a party.

Clothing:
As a cross-over from hygiene to clothing, let me just mention underwear. Yes. Your underpants smell if you’ve worn them the previous day. Change your underwear every day. Even if you don’t think it smells! Change it.

Right. First a very simple fact:
Men do not look better naked. You certainly don’t. Unless you have an ass like a Chippendale (which you don’t) or an arse like Mel Gibson (which you don’t) avoid nakedness until the very last moment.

Do not wear white socks. Seriously…just don’t.
If you are going to be naked (like when having sex) remove your socks. If there’s one thing less attractive than a naked man, it’s a naked man with socks on.
Woman can have sex with just their bobby socks on. Men can’t wear bobby socks, so take them off.

Do not wear underwear with a string up your arse. No tangas, no strings and NO LEATHER underwear. 99% of women find men wearing strings seriously off-putting. If you’ve managed to hook up with that 1%, you’ve hooked up to someone you really don’t want to be with.
Wear boxer shorts. That’s safe. Don’t wear boxer shorts with funny images or texts like: “I like big boobies” on them. Just plain, black boxer shorts.

The rest of your clothing should make you feel relaxed. It doesn’t really matter what you wear, as long as it’s clean and you feel comfortable wearing it.

Body odour:
You don’t want to smell. That’s why you take a shower. You [I]do[/I] want to enhance your natural smell (everyone has one, it’s what attracts the opposite sex), that’s why you wear aftershave. You want to protect yourself from starting to smell because of sweating, that’s why you wear deodorant.
Roll on deodorant is the best. It doesn’t mingle with the smell of your aftershave in your clothes. Obviously if you’re really cool you may have matching deodorant and aftershave. Generally though, a roll on 24-hour protection deodorant will last longer.
Men can wear two sorts of ‘aftershave’. Aftershave or eau de toilet. Aftershave is fresher but doesn’t last as long as eau de toilet. Eau de toilet does not mean Toilet odour.
DO NOT OVER-DO YOUR EAU DE TOILET! You do not want to go to the pub, restaurant or cinema smelling like a Taiwanese brothel. It should enhance your natural smell, not smother it.

Watch what your date is eating, drinking etc. If she doesn’t smoke, you don’t smoke. If she doesn’t drink alcohol, you don’t drink alcohol and if she doesn’t eat garlic, you don’t eat garlic. Repeat that sentence once or twice!
There’s nothing worse than snogging someone who tastes like a beer filled ashtray the day after a party when you’ve got a hang-over.
Beer makes your breath smell. One beer is excusable, but when the alcohol stench starts-a-reeking you really need peppermints.
Don’t use chewing gum. You’re not a cow, you don’t want to chew like one.

Originally posted by shavixmir
Let me sum it up for you:

[b]Part I:

How to impress girls

Introduction:
Often as I read the forums (or fora as they may happen to be called), in between bouts of serious chess playing, I stumble across the occasional plea for help. Many along the lines of: “Is dating good?” and “How should I behave when…”. So, being the proper little behav ...[text shortened]... need peppermints.
Don’t use chewing gum. You’re not a cow, you don’t want to chew like one.
[/b]

Part II:

Behaviour:
I’ve divided this part in three segments: Meeting a girl, going out on the first date and first sex. Please don’t skip the first two parts…

Meeting a girl:
Everybody is insecure. Well, obviously not everybody is insecure, but the majority of people who are not should be and generally they are men who wear strings or are women who fancy men in leather underwear.
But, as a good rule-of-fist, most girls think they are too fat, most are obsessed about how they appear and most don’t find themselves interesting.
This is not good for them…but, it is good for you!

You are insecure as well (especially if you’ve bothered to read this all the way through&hellip😉. That’s why you should shower, that’s why you shouldn’t drown yourself in aftershave and that’s why I’ve told you to wear clothes you feel comfortable in. You need to build up your self-confidence.
Everybody thinks self-confident people are attractive. Insecurity is not attractive and unless you are justifiably good at something, then being arrogant about it is not attractive either (this means that you can be attractively arrogant, but you need to be as good as you boast to pull it off…so…basically…don’t go there! You’re just not that good. Accept it).

So there’s a thin line to wander along here. Acceptance is the key. No. Don’t question me. Accept yourself. Your zits. Your glasses. Your belly. Just accept them.
Self confidence expresses itself by being able to laugh at your own ineptness.
It’s not bad to be fat. It’s bad to be so serious about it that you become unconfident about it.
It’s not bad to have crooked teeth. It’s sad if you can’t laugh at them.
Accept yourself and laugh at yourself.

Failure is not bad. Failure is experience. Every experience should have its funny sides. Accept failure and laugh about it. Don’t fail slightly. Fail grandly.
If you fail by 0.5 of a point people will call it tragic. If you fail by 10 points and you lift your eyebrows and say: “Holy macaroni…am I really that crap?” People will admire you. Your greatest failures should become your best anecdotes in life! People connect with grand failure in ways they can’t with equally grand successes.

Oh. Don’t constantly point out your own weaknesses! It’s best to wait for other people to pick up on them. Then you laugh at them. If you’re pointing them out, they are no longer weaknesses and it may look as if you’re manipulating the situation…

Be honest. If you think someone looks good. Tell them. If you think someone has lovely eyes…tell them (do for god’s sake make sure you know which colour they are though!). If you think someone’s hair is lovely, compliment them.
If someone looks you in the eye, smile at them and then look away. Don’t look away at nothing, look away at something or somebody.
If you are all alone somewhere, don’t fidget. Read a book.
Don’t be afraid to touch someone. Don’t be too willing either.
Don’t use chat-up lines. If you have nothing interesting to say, don’t say anything. Observe what’s happening. Comment on that. There’s always something happening.

Don’t look at her mammary protuberances (that’s her tits by the way)! Yes. She is showing cleavage on purpose, but don’t look at them. Think of looking at her breasts as a sort of venus-fly-trap. She wants you to look at them, but by looking at them you’re throwing everything away.
Don’t question it, just do as I instruct and you’ll be fine.

Don’t ask girls out to dinner. Don’t invite them back to your house. Don’t take them to concerts and don’t invite them to parties unless you are inviting a group at the same time.
Once you’ve met a girl, and you think you like her, ask if she wants to meet up (at least 2 days later, 5 at the most though) and have lunch (middle of the day) or a donut (end of the day, still during daylight though).
If she asks if you’ll phone, phone her the next day. Never phone more than once. If you get an answering machine say who you are and what your phone number is. Don’t phone a second time.

The first date:
You are all ready for your first date. Basically everything above is what you need to know. If everything goes well, then you can invite her out to do whatever you both find interesting.
A couple of pointers do come to mind though:

Be interested in her. Let her do most of the talking. Girls like to talk about themselves, it makes them think they’re important (is that sexist? Well…just to be fair…men are exactly the same, but since this is a guide for men, let the woman talk!).

If you are going to initialise the goodbye kiss (which is quite alright to do). Make sure she knows you are aiming for her cheek for a quick peck. If she wants more, she’ll turn her head.
Your kiss on her cheek should not be soggy. Once you’ve kissed her cheek smile at her and say your goodbye, turn and walk away. It generally is best if you’ve already picked a next date by this time though…

First sex:
There are proper ways to kiss. Move your lips when you are kissing; your mouth is not a suction pad. Your tongue is not a cement mixer.
Touch her face when you are kissing… not constantly though.

Right. No matter what your older brother or your best friend has told you: Women do not want to be spanked on a first date and they really don’t want to hear you whisper in a hoarse voice: “Who’s your daddy?”

REMOVE YOUR SOCKS.

Don’t rip clothing. You’re not in a Hollywood B-film.

You don’t want to appear to know but one position, but you don’t want to seem to be trying out the whole Kama Sutra either. 2 or 3 positions is quite fine. No, not the Lotus position. Not the one where she’s on her head and you are balancing on the wardrobe either.
Missionary is good. You can look at each other with that one. It’s good for going slow. A great starter and a great finisher.
Doggy style is good too. It’s another sensation for her. No, I wasn’t joking…don’t spank her. And equally (or probably more so) don’t stick your fingers up any extra holes whilst in this position on a first date either.
Her on top.
There you go. 3 very basic positions. All three give different sensations and all three are perfectly normal and most people do them.

An old cliché, but perfectly true: She should orgasm first.
If it’s going to be a one night stand (like if she’s a total skank or something), don’t worry about it. But, if you really like her, you are probably aiming for a follow up…so you want to impress her.
Most girls don’t orgasm during copulation! So that means you have to do other things as well.
The clitoris is not the arc of the covenant and your tongue is not Indiana Jones though. Don’t dive in there like you’re Tarzan trying to save his monkey! Slowly work your way to where you want to be.
If you don’t know what the clitoris is or where you can find it, look it up in an encyclopaedia. That’s one of those big books full of information. You can find them in most libraries (big building full of books). If you feel uncomfortable asking the ageing lady behind the desk which volume you need, ask for the volume with ‘clique’ in it. Say that you are interested in group behaviour or something.

If you are not sure what she thinks of something you are doing…ask. It’s better to be sure she’s enjoying herself rather than her suffering as you do sexual suicide.

To sum it all up:
You are now all ready to go out and enjoy yourself. You know everything you need to. Make a few more chess moves. Do a couple of relaxing shoulder exercises.
Clean yourself!
Accept failure!
Wear a condom!

Party on!