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My Bible so big and heavy

My Bible so big and heavy

Spirituality

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It doubles as the tablets of stone in the Exodus play.

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The geneology in Matthew comes with pictures.

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Originally posted by kirksey957
It doubles as the tablets of stone in the Exodus play.
My Bible so heavy, Benny Hinn can't swing it even on his most manic day.

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My Bible so big, the Pope said it was too extravagant to be allowed into the Vatican.

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My Bible so big, its Old Testament paper was made from every tree in Eden, and its New Testament from the remains of Noah's Ark.

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My Bible so heavy, prisoners have to lift all those weights in the yard just so they can find Jesus.

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My Bible so heavy that it comes with instructions on how to use as a millstone around one's neck.

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My Bible so heavy it comes with a special John Hagee cookbook behind the concordance.

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My Bible so heavy that "My burden is light, my yoke easy" was edited out lest it seem hypocritical.

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My Bible so big, if you melted down its gilded edges, you could recreate Aaron's Golden Calf.

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My Bible's so big, even God can't lift it.

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My Bible so big, when the preacher says to turn to Philippians 4:13, I always get too tired and quit before I get there.

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My bible so big it has a special fold-out "scratch and sniff" picture of Rahab the prostitute.

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Originally posted by kirksey957
My bible so big it has a special fold-out "scratch and sniff" picture of Rahab the prostitute.
LOL.

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My Bible so big, you could use its leather cover to reupholster all the seats in the Pope's SUV.