By the sound of your post you must be on the right track-and I say that in all honesty, but why do you insist on trying to persuade us, totally unsuccesfully mind you, that we too must take your path? why??
Well, I'll give it my best shot.
Actually my goal is more modest usually. That is just to get you to think on some things. And if anyone as a result decides to start to read through the Bible more carefully for themselves, I am very happy.
Is it because if others follow then you will feel more justified in your life path you have chosen?
I share the gospel because I want to be on the winning side of history.
You see one inevitable and unstopable outcome of world history, I know, will be the total vindication of the man Jesus of Nazareth. I just would like to on the side of the Victor.
Or is it simply that you feel sorry for us wretched sinners and you are trying your best to persuade as many as possible that your way is the right one? (and if it is the latter, how many do you think you've got to follow you? )
This is a rather cynical question. But I am going to give you an honest answer.
One of the things that gives the evangelizing Christian the burden to keep wanting to tell others is definitely this:
He or she just cannot believe their great fortune that God has granted them the ability to believe in the Savior Christ and receive the eternal salvation.
The saved receiver just cannot allow that others to not have at least the same chance. He is haunted by the thought - "But why me Lord ? Why me ?"
Because of the weight of that burden on his new heart that he knows he was undeserving, least deserving
others just have to know about Jesus. They have to.
It is a burden for the lost right from God's heart. Others just have to have a chance to be blessed by the undeserved eternal blessing of Christ as the gospel speaker was.
We too, many of us, scoffed at first.