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best joke ever...

best joke ever...

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i mowed the grass today and now i have a red hot lawn

thank you.... and good night


I wish my lawn was emo.


Then it would cut itself.
😞

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Originally posted by Bad wolf
I wish my lawn was emo.


Then it would cut itself.
😞
Don't berate yourself too much, that was kinda funny - recc'd!

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Originally posted by demonseed
Don't berate yourself too much, that was kinda funny - recc'd!
You clearly weren't in Middle School in the last 5 years.

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What children's game is now banned in Germany?



Follow the leader.

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Had a crash this morning. Hit a car up the backside. Fella got out the car and he was a dwarf. He said, "I'm not happy." I said,"Which one are you then?"

Not the funniest, but still worth a smile and clean enough to tell your Mum!

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I was driving down the M6 when the cell phone rang. It was my boss to tell me that i got the promotion i was after, and I was so happy that i lost control of the vehicle, and it hit a tree.

When the Police came and asked me what happened, i said " I careered off the road"

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The post that was quoted here has been removed
This seems to be bad timing given that it happened ten years ago this summer. I guess there's going to be a big to-do about it in Britain in August.



:'(

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The post that was quoted here has been removed
I think these are in extremely bad taste and will be alerting the moderators.

As Suzi has pointed out, the fact that it close to the 10th year since her death.

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Why does everyone care so much about her anyway?
She was born into a priveledged background for christ sake, bloody aristocrats, they get all of the attention. 😞
And here's me, a poor working class SOB being told I can't take the mick out of these poor priveledged pillacs.
It ain't fair. 🙁

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Originally posted by Bad wolf
Why does everyone care so much about her anyway?
She was born into a priveledged background for christ sake, bloody aristocrats, they get all of the attention. 😞
And here's me, a poor working class SOB being told I can't take the mick out of these poor priveledged pillacs.
It ain't fair. 🙁

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Originally posted by Bad wolf
Why does everyone care so much about her anyway?
She was born into a priveledged background for christ sake, bloody aristocrats, they get all of the attention. 😞
And here's me, a poor working class SOB being told I can't take the mick out of these poor priveledged pillacs.
It ain't fair. 🙁
Because she was a massive figurehead of this country. An having earned the "Kings Shilling" when I was in the Navy, I wont have a word said against them. Expecially Diana, the way she was treated in her last days.

Plus the fact, she is all over the news at the minute so this has cut particularly raw, expecially as a Briton.

Jokes are jokes but given the circumstances and the way she died, I think its discusting that jokes like this can be put on a public forum.

Who is to say there isnt a few Royals on this forum?? Or imagine one of the Princes reading this filth..... have a bit of concideration.

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Originally posted by rmacken
Because she was a massive figurehead of this country. An having earned the "Kings Shilling" when I was in the Navy, I wont have a word said against them. Expecially Diana, the way she was treated in her last days.

Plus the fact, she is all over the news at the minute so this has cut particularly raw, expecially as a Briton.

Jokes are jokes but given t ...[text shortened]... his forum?? Or imagine one of the Princes reading this filth..... have a bit of concideration.
I couldn't give a toss if she was a figurehead of the country, and I will stretch this further to the royal family.
They have not in any way earned their position, they have just inherited because of their position in society: I find this absolutely disgusting, and I will treat them with scorn as a result.

For any Royals here, I would like to say that you are all selfish, undeserving little gits, I want your family removed from your throne, your funding from the government removed as well. You do not deserve it.