Originally posted by Very RustyIf you're not gonna bother reading my posts, why bother responding?
Perhaps your laws will change and catch up with the rest of us!
I noticed you have not answer for what happens when the kid tell you:
HEY THAT DIDN'T HURT!!! WHAT THEN???? Give me the answers here, you are always calling me a tard etc., that is the actions of a BULLY, you just don't realize it.
And you mean it when you say it, it is no JOKE.
I p ...[text shortened]... n many ways, because you are doing what you were taught...SAD...And around and around it goes.
I have no idea what I would do. Probably laugh my ass off. What should I do when that happens? Steal her toys?
Originally posted by SunburntWell said bump.
Some people spank their kids for everything.
Some people hit their kids abusively and out of anger.
Question: do you really think a parent who spanks occasionally isn't a good parent, a smart parent or a parent who uses their brain?
I will tell you this:
My kids? They are emotionally intelligent. Why? Because since they were tiny toddlers, I have talked to them like they were adults. I have always treated my kids like human beings who must understand that there are rules to life, existing, success, responsibility, behavior and consequences. When my kids tell me stories about other kids at school, they give me a keen view of that person's behavior. They also show me that they understand how to deal with what they see on a level that isn't even grasped by most adults. What's more is my children have a very strong sense of their own worth and they show me this time after time.
Can they be themselves at home? Yes. Can they get out of control and have their toddler moments, now, even at ages 8 and 11? Yes. Will my daughter get a smack on her butt once in awhile and a march to her room if she refuses to stop her hormonal drama rants? Yes.
So when we are talking about spanking we are not talking about abuse. We are not. If your opinion is that it somehow hinders good parenting, I disagree. When used with measure for the right reason and timing, it is entirely effective. My children are an example.
It's common sense. I know damn well that anything beyond the spank I have delivered would be overboard. I know what abuse is. Each parent can make their own choice but I think the judgment is too hasty and too black and white.
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Originally posted by SunburntOkay, for about the 3rd time, this is not about abuse. This is about the notion that you can be a better disciplinarian and parent if you don't resort to physical means. If you're going to justify physical means by suggesting it is in the absence of the ability to communicate rules and understanding effectively in intense or extreme situations, why are you still spanking an 11 year old? Does she really still not understand, or has it become your habitual way of dealing with things?
Some people spank their kids for everything.
Some people hit their kids abusively and out of anger.
Question: do you really think a parent who spanks occasionally isn't a good parent, a smart parent or a parent who uses their brain?
I will tell you this:
My kids? They are emotionally intelligent. Why? Because since they were tiny to nt can make their own choice but I think the judgment is too hasty and too black and white.
Originally posted by CrowleyWhere did you answer the question at?
If you're not gonna bother reading my posts, why bother responding?
I have no idea what I would do. Probably laugh my ass off. What should I do when that happens? Steal her toys?
Tell me what are you going to do when the child says: Hey that don't hurt me!!
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Originally posted by PhlabibitTaking a toy away is a privilege lost not abuse.
A pop on the bottom is physical abuse.
Taking a toy or freedom and privileges is emotional abuse.
If we must keep throwing that word 'abuse' around.
Hitting is abuse, & it really is that simple.
There is never a good reason to hit your child!
I don't think it matters whether or not you choose to hit your child as long as the decision is made for the right reasons. Physical punishments should not be arbritrary except maybe in the most serious cases where the kid needs to be brought into line NOW.
That means make it part of a system so the kids understand why they're getting hit. Don't just smack them when you feel like it because you're angry.
Originally posted by StarrmanNah, my 11 year old might need a pop twice a year. I was trying to come up with an example. Honestly, my daughters are going through puberty and they can be really unreasonable sometimes. I have no habitual way of dealing with things, besides certain consequences. Each year, my kids have changed and I deal with them differently depending on their maturity level and where they're at. Discipline in my house is largely the absence of privileges and items.
Okay, for about the 3rd time, this is not about abuse. This is about the notion that you can be a better disciplinarian and parent if you don't resort to physical means. If you're going to justify physical means by suggesting it is in the absence of the ability to communicate rules and understanding effectively in intense or extreme situations, why are yo ...[text shortened]... es she really still not understand, or has it become your habitual way of dealing with things?
I just think people overreact to spanking. I don't really believe that you can be a better or worse disciplinarian if you don't spank on occasion. I've seen worse parents who can't discipline for the life of them and they never spank, ever.
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Originally posted by StarrmanIt will not be too much longer when the child will hit her back, and after awhile there will be no more hitting because the kid will be stronger!
Okay, for about the 3rd time, this is not about abuse. This is about the notion that you can be a better disciplinarian and parent if you don't resort to physical means. If you're going to justify physical means by suggesting it is in the absence of the ability to communicate rules and understanding effectively in intense or extreme situations, why are yo ...[text shortened]... es she really still not understand, or has it become your habitual way of dealing with things?
I just hope the kids pops her hard enough so she knows what it feels like.
Originally posted by AThousandYoungI've smacked her hand after she tried to swing the cat around by its' tail and once when she let go of my hand and tried to run into the road at her school.
I don't think it matters whether or not you choose to hit your child as long as the decision is made for the right reasons. Physical punishments should not be arbritrary except maybe in the most serious cases where the kid needs to be brought into line NOW.
That means make it part of a system so the kids understand why they're getting hit. Don't just smack them when you feel like it because you're angry.
These are scenarios I have no sense of humour about and needed immediate action.
Anyway, I'm out. Rusty is stinking yet another thread up and this laptop doesn't have gbaway on, so I have to see his posts now.