funny quotes

There are two reasons I don't trust people

1. I don't know them

2. I know them

There are two secrets to becoming successful.

1. Never let anyone know all your secrets.

I assume economists are competent.

Think like a Proton and stay positive 😉

“Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.” – Dave Barry

“One of they key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace. Good people don’t go into government.”
Donald J. Trump

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra. ”
― Fran Lebowitz

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog... it's too dark to read."

- Groucho Marx

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
― Groucho Marx

Originally posted by @ponderable
In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra. ”
― Fran Lebowitz

"Then satan said, 'Let us put the alphabet in math'"

Originally posted by @whodey
"Then satan said, 'Let us put the alphabet in math'"

"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please."
- Mark Twain

Originally posted by @wolfe63
"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please."
- Mark Twain

I will tell you the truth three different ways before I would lie to you...
My Step Dad

Originally posted by @leur
I will tell you the truth three different ways before I would lie to you...
My Step Dad

Ok, who broke this (room full of people) "LEUR!"?

It worked fine the last time I used it.

(Meet my dad)

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not. - Mark Twain

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

Don Marquis