A mathematician, a physicist, an engineer and a computer scientist are asked to prove that all odd numbers are prime.
The mathematician says: 1 is a special case, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is divisible by 3 so the theorem is disproved.
The physicist's report arrives next: 1 is a bit of an odd case, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is divisible by 3 but that's within acceptable error so the theorem is provisionally true but requires more investigation and therefore more funding.
The engineer says: 1 is prime, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, looks good to me.
The computer scientist's report reads:
1 is prime
1 is prime
1 is prime
1 is prime
An accountant, a biologist and a mathematician were having lunch together across the street from an empty building. They observed 2 people go into the building and about an hour later, 3 people come out of the building.
The accountant concludes that their original tally was inaccurate.
The biologist believes the 2 people must have reproduced.
The mathematician says, "If someone walks into the building now, it will be empty again."
Famous last words
Nuclear physicist: See, cold fusion does not work.
Nuclear physisist: What was the critical mass, exactly?
Physisist: And now we reach absolute zero.
Astronomer: That asteroid won't hit the Earth.
Chemist: And now the tasting test.
Chemist: And now a little bit from this...
Chemist: And now shake it a bit.
Chemist: Why is there no label on this bottle?
Chemist: In which glass was my mineral water?
Chemist: Why does that stuff burn with a green flame?!?
Chemist: First the acid, then the water...
Chemist: Oh no, wrong beaker...
Microbiologist: These bacteria cannot live outside the substrate.
Field biologist: They never attack humans.