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RHP VERSE COMPETITION

RHP VERSE COMPETITION

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And as the minstrels brucked their strings
their music portent to coming things
the hymn around the battle field rings
and tells of cuts, bruckses and stings

"You little bruck it's all your fault"
said Starrlet Pirp to Merry Knight
"This thing must come now to a halt!
Do you want these two great hordes to fight?"

Said Merry; "Tis too late for thoughts
of brucking in the towel,
forget all thoughts of vietnam,
tis the Abruckalypse Now!" *

"You really are a puntastic bruck,
remind me whence cometh tomorra'
to bruck you with Geltenpimpenschwert"
Said Merry; "Ooh, the horror!"

"It is the way with things like these",
cried Bruckiel from on high
"to choose a champion for our needs
the lesser men to die."

"Starrlet Pirpernel, I choose thee,
to take on this great honour.
Bruckelzeebub: "I'll use the knight
then pirp will be a gonna"

Pirp and Knight smiled knowingly
"I'm afraid we're brucktheist,
So both of you have lost, you see,
you actually don't exist!"

And as they spake those fateful words,
The Finnish minstrels; "we'll sock it to ya"
the demons and the angels disappeared
to a Hard Bruck Brucklelujah!

So Starr and Merry, their foes all bruquished
made peace with one another
And spent their lives in philosophical chat
as brucker would with brucker.

*(redux edition obviously - ED)

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*BUMP* would have been quicker.

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I'm holding all your poetry hostage until someone not from Lapland gives evidence of having read the Celestial Bruckllad and thereby justified my travels in Lapland.

I bet nobody knew they'd signed up for a competition with a passive-aggressive arbiter. Plonkers 😛.

1 edit
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Is it poets that end up dying of syphilis or was that painters?

EDIT: It was poets.

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Originally posted by XanthosNZ
Is it poets that end up dying of syphilis or was that painters?

EDIT: It was poets.
Never generalize.

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Originally posted by XanthosNZ
Is it poets that end up dying of syphilis or was that painters?

EDIT: It was poets.
You're from Lapland, so I don't even have to decide if you've done the assigned reading or not. Even if you have, you cannot compel me to release the hostages.

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Originally posted by XanthosNZ
Is it poets that end up dying of syphilis or was that painters?

EDIT: It was poets.
Yes. Painters only go insane and cut off their ears.

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Originally posted by Nordlys
Yes. Painters only go insane and cut off their ears.
http://www.llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.com/information-about-llanfair.htm

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A day with no props is a day with no judgement.

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Originally posted by royalchicken
A day with no props is a day with no judgement.
Why don't you just get on with it?

2 edits
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Originally posted by Bowmann
Why don't you just get on with it?
I slew too many sheep with the Geltenpimpenschwert and listened to my own howls of anguish echo 'round far too many fjords in my pursuit of 14th-century Hrothgaro-Lapp literature to allow my findings to go unread. Brucktoplasme and Bytchtarred, it is said, used the blood of an entire flock for that Bruckllad, and they'd turn over in their graves at the thought of it being callously ignored by the philistines of RHP.

There will be no verse competition until well-informed props have been given.

EDIT Recs are discouraged. B & B would turn back over in their graves at the thought of a simple pompous historian like me taking credit for their labours.

1 edit
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The Iranian hostage crisis this isn't 😕.

I really am not the author of the Bruckllad. This is a selfless request that it be read before the competition continues.

If nobody reads it in the next 72 hours, I will start killing the hostages in a linguistically unpleasant manner. As proof that I'm serious, here's a full stop brutally cut off of one of them:

.

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Originally posted by royalchicken
The Iranian hostage crisis this isn't 😕.

I really am not the author of the Bruckllad. This is a selfless request that it be read before the competition continues.

If nobody reads it in the next 72 hours, I will start killing the hostages in a linguistically unpleasant manner. As proof that I'm serious, here's a full stop brutally cut off of one of them:

.
No-one likes a beggar.

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Originally posted by Starrman
No-one likes a beggar.
Exactly. Don't beg for the competition to continue, just get a non-Lapp to give into my demands.

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This is going to get very ugly very soon.