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Winged bird

Winged bird

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Don't worry...
about a thing.
Cause every little thing's...
gonna be alright.

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Flame thrower, some salt and lemon pepper...

Alternatively, get a towel or something and try to throw it over the bird.
If you can cover it you might be able to pick it up without getting clawed and pecked.

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Set out a chessboard and ask her whether she wants to play black or white. What else would you do??

I suppose you could put out some seeds and things to make her feel at home

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If its a bird of prey, I would suggest going to a pet store and purchasing some rodents. You then use the rodents as a peace offering, and earn its trust. If you form a bond you could then train the bird to fly into other peoples flats and take valuables.
If that dosn't work you could ignore it untill it gets bored and leaves on its own.

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Leave the window open and herd it toward it. Use newspapers etc in your hands to control as much space as you can so it can't get around you.

Or, let your cat into the room.

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Write a long, melancholy poem in between heavy drinking sessions.

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Originally posted by Bosse de Nage
Write a long, melancholy poem in between heavy drinking sessions.
Is there a long melancholic poem thread?

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I've had magpies fall down the chimney twice. I just grab them and throw them out the front door. Why can't you grab a bird?

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Get a cat. Either the bird gets motivated to make a quick escape or you don't have to feed the cat that evening.

And get some good insurance. There is sometimes a bit of property damage that goes along with this method.

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Boy! Now that we really need him, the Crocodile Hunter is gone...


😞