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Chaney3

Chaney3

Spirituality

3 edits

Why don't you accept your "free gift" already?

Your "free gift" has been set aside especially for you and contains your assurance of "salvation".

Trouble getting those sin stains out? Your "free gift" will clean out the toughest sin stains. "Though your sins are as scarlet", with the "blood of Christ" "they will be as white as snow".

Tired of having your old sins weigh on your mind? Tired of feeling guilty? Accept your "free gift" now and we'll include forgiveness at absolutely no extra charge.

Wait there's more. With your "free gift" you'll also receive "eternal life". No more fretting about your "eternal destination".

Accept your "free gift" today and as a special bonus you'll also receive entrance into the "Kingdom". Reserve the place we've set aside especially for you.

Be sure to ask about our "prosperity gospel" package.

Offer may not be valid for Roman Catholics, Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses.


@thinkofone said
Why don't you accept your "free gift" already?

Your "free gift" has been set aside especially for you and contains your assurance of "salvation".

Trouble getting those sin stains out? Your "free gift" will clean out the toughest sin stains. "Though your sins are as scarlet", with the "blood of Christ" "they will be as white as snow".

Tired of having your old sin ...[text shortened]... about our "prosperity gospel" package.

Offer may not be valid for Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses.
Sounds suspicious.
Do I need to do anything?

1 edit

@chaney3 said
Sounds suspicious.
Do I need to do anything?
Simply accept the "free gift". Sound too good to be true? Billions of satisfied Christians cannot be wrong. Don't be the last person on your block to have one.


@thinkofone said
Simply accept the "free gift". Sound too good to be true? Billions of satisfied Christians cannot be wrong. Don't be the last person on your block to have one.
Would I have to stop sinning?
There are some sins that I rather enjoy.


@chaney3 said
Would I have to stop sinning?
There are some sins that I rather enjoy.
Accept your "free gift" now and we'll include forgiveness at absolutely no extra charge.


@thinkofone said
Accept your "free gift" now and we'll include forgiveness at absolutely no extra charge.
If I were interested, how do I accept this "free gift"?


@chaney3 said
If I were interested, how do I accept this "free gift"?
Believe and ye shall receive. Absolutely no works necessary.


@thinkofone said
Believe and ye shall receive. Absolutely no works necessary.
Believe what?


@thinkofone said
Believe and ye shall receive. Absolutely no works necessary.
Ever heard of the fruits of the Spirit?


@chaney3 said
Sounds suspicious.
Do I need to do anything?
lol .... f*** your funny 😆

5 edits

@chaney3 said
Believe what?
"Believe in Jesus".

Choose from more than a dozen ancillary beliefs. Mix and match to your desire. Pick one, pick all at no additional charge.

Bad righteousness. No problem. The righteousness of Jesus Christ will be imputed to you. You heard right. The righteousness of Jesus Christ will be imputed to you. Your righteousness will "surpass that of the scribes and Pharisees". Guaranteed. You do absolutely nothing. We do all the work.

Accept your "free gift" today.


2 Timothy 3 English Standard Version (ESV)

3 But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.

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@thinkofone said
"Believe in Jesus".

Choose from more than a dozen ancillary beliefs. Mix and match to your desire. Pick one, pick all at no additional charge.

Bad righteousness. No problem. The righteousness of Jesus Christ will be imputed to you. You heard right. The righteousness of Jesus Christ will be imputed to you. Your righteousness will "surpass that of the scribes and Pharisees". Guaranteed. You do absolutely nothing. We do all the work.

Accept your "free gift" today.
You seem to have forgotten about repentance.


@kellyjay said
2 Timothy 3 English Standard Version (ESV)

3 But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen ...[text shortened]... than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.
Is this ... ...lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God aimed at all non-Christians or just ThinkOfOne?


@fmf said
Is this ... ...lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God aimed at all non-Christians or just ThinkOfOne?
If the shoe fits...

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