Originally posted by kirksey957
Let's work this from the other angle. Isn't it better that the child, as you say, has some sense of remorse and is able to say "i'm sorry" or even behave responsibly because it is the better way to do things, than becomes compliant and pleasing only because there is an ice cream cone at the end of the day?
My wife had her 'God Child' come stay with us. He spent a few bucks of his money on gum. My wife held the gum, and he kept asking for it. She gave him about 3 pieces each day, so that was more like 5 or so over the weekend.
She brings the kid back to meet his mother, and says... 'Oh, here is his gum'.
The mother says, 'What? He's not supposed to have gum'. (Cat was out of the bag now!)
She calls the child over and says, 'Why did you get gum? You know you are not supposed to have gum.'
The kid said, "sorry" and does that little head tilt body twisting half smile thing....
Mother says, "You're sorry? Would you do it again? If so, I guess you are not sorry, are you?".
Now he was starting to act a bit sorry.
Well, my wife and friend decide to have a piece of gum, just to ruffle the kids feathers a bit more... but Joke was on them!
The gum was about the sourest purple stuff you could imagine, and came in huge blocks. They were trying not to make pucker faces, and it was killing them!
Anyway, don't say 'sorry' unless you are... and don't be sorry just cuz you got busted. Don't ask to be forgiven, don't do it again would be much better.
ES