Originally posted by c99uxno. i meant i'm. i just didn't want to put in the appostrify. or however you spell it. i don't really care.
That's nice, good. You just need some English lessons now then.
Which reminds me of a "Polish" "Policeman" joke I once heard:
Ever notice how the policemen in Poland walk around in pairs? It's because one can read and the other can write.
Sometimes, however, you see three of them.
Well, the one in the middle can read AND write, and the other two are guarding the scientist...
EDIT: ps... Did you mean to write "him is smart"?
Originally posted by Zelindalol... enjoy this one.
a blonde girl is speeding past a police car. The policew officer has her pull over. He goes up to her window and asks to see her lisence. She looks at him scoldingly and says, "I wish you guys would make up your minds! Just yesterday you took it away from me, and now you expect me to show it to you!"
Originally posted by Kaboooombayeah that ones funny. i know another funny one, which isn't blonde, but i'm going to write it anyway.
lol... enjoy this one.
There is 3 people on a plane which is going to crash if they don't lighten the load. The first guys has a bunch of rocks, the second has oranges, and the third has grenades ( or however you spell it) as their carry-on iteams. they throw off all the luggage but the plane is still too heavy. so they have to throw off the carry-on iteams.
The plane lands safely. When the first man walks oust of the airport, he sees a little boy crying. He asks the little boy what's wrong. the little boy says "my daddy got hit on the head with a bunch of rocks and died."
The second man walks out of the airport and sees a little boy crying. He asks the little boy what's wrong. the little boy says "my daddy got hit on the head with a bunch of oranges and died."
The third man walks out of the airport to see a little boy laughing his head off. the man asks what's so funny and the little boy says "My dad farted and the house blew up!"🙄
Originally posted by c99uxI would also think that the bank would be responsible for the vehicle during the 3 weeks, so add on 3 weeks of no-insurance-hassles.
OK so here's the truth (and it IS a true story, it happened in 1993...):
It wasn't a blonde; the man who left his car (it was actually a Lambourghini Countache) with a junior teller of Citibank (his biggest rival) was an American called Bruce Richardson, who was then head trader of Japanese government bonds for Barings Bank before Nick Leeson took over...
...[text shortened]... axi to the airport for him, and picked him up when he returned. He was sacked for doing it...
Originally posted by c99uxActually, this has to be balls!
OK so here's the truth (and it IS a true story, it happened in 1993...):
It wasn't a blonde; the man who left his car (it was actually a Lambourghini Countache) with a junior teller of Citibank (his biggest rival) was an American called Bruce Richardson, who was then head trader of Japanese government bonds for Barings Bank before Nick Leeson took over...
...[text shortened]... axi to the airport for him, and picked him up when he returned. He was sacked for doing it...
Firstly, when a bank take security for a loan (which they tend not to for a crappy personal loan) they don't actually impound the security they just take a charge over the deeds etc.
Secondly, a vehicle is not really great security. Property or land is really the order of the day.
Thirdly, a teller wouldn't have the authority to grant a loan.
Originally posted by demonseedand we need to know this because...?
Actually, this has to be balls!
Firstly, when a bank take security for a loan (which they tend not to for a crappy personal loan) they don't actually impound the security they just take a charge over the deeds etc.
Secondly, a vehicle is not really great security. Property or land is really the order of the day.
Thirdly, a teller wouldn't have the authority to grant a loan.
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Originally posted by Zelindaa blond, a fat chick and Mr. Bush deceided to go for a day tramp when they came across a huge cave. "Let's have a look inside" said Mr. Bush, thinking 'T' 😉 may be hiding inside.
ok, this isn't even a blonde joke, so why does it matter?
p.s. any one got some new blonde jokes?
"i'll go in" piped up the fat chick wanting to showing her two friends how brave she is. so she immediately marches into the cave. a few seconds passes, then a scream as she came running out. "poooooo!!! there's a skunk in there."
Mr. Bush gets a worried look on his face as he MUST have a look in this cave. how could he sleep at night if there was a chance terrorists were hiding inside. again he was at that point where his hope had gone, so as usual he went down on his knees to pray when the blond tapped him on the shoulder "is it my turn now ?". "yes! my dear, it is your turn" said Mr.Bush as he wipes the tear from his eye. "God bless His most special daughter!"
"Poooooo... there's a skunk in there", screamed the blond as she came running out "and it STINKS !!!"
not being one to let the situation get out of hand Mr.Bush immediately got on the blower and within a minute a gas mask dropped from the sky. "i just LOVE being god" said Mr. Bush with that cheeky smile we all see him with. off he trots into the cave doing HIS DUTY for His COUNTRY for GOD.
"pooooo!!!", screams the skunk as it comes running out.
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the frog and the blond.
soooo... the frog said to the blond, " i was once a handsome prince untill an evil witch put a spell on me. But you can change all that!"
"one kiss from you and i will turn back into a handsome prince. and then we can marry, move into the castle with my mum, and you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel happy doing so."
That night, the blond had frog-legs for dinner ...
Originally posted by ZelindaI could put you down with an insult so traumatic that you would need six years counselling, suffer from a stutter (you wouldn't be able to say that!), and probably pi$$ the bed every night.
ok, this isn't even a blonde joke, so why does it matter?
p.s. any one got some new blonde jokes?
But I can't be bothered to expend the effort. For now I will just tell you to shut your mouth you oxygen starved at birth, crappy thread starting, piece of chemical waste.