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Originally posted by reader1107yeah well 28 of those reside in Loose alone!
Dr. Seitse should learn not to leave his office door open when he leaves the forum!
I was thinking, we could just say Troose instead of Trevor and Loose, but then the doc would only be able to charge one person instead of...hmm...it looks like he's billing 29 people!
Originally posted by cadwahDear Mr. Cadwah,
Dr Seitse, I am afraid to admit I have fallen off the wagon again. I am starting to think that sobriety isn't for me. I also experimented with mind altering substances this evening. I have resorted to listening to Roger Waters and licking the kitchen floor clean. Help me.
I cannot help you because you have already seen the light: Roger
Waters and substance consumption is the path of the righteous
man, the threshold of a new understanding of yourself and
the world. Left alone in an island is a perfect metaphor for the
loneliness of the current, individualistic world -a world where no
connection can be made with the other until a connection is
made with oneself.
Yours,
Dr. Seitse, a.k.a. the grateful dead
Dear Ms. CrissyB,
I am happy to see you joined our group therapy sessions. In order
to obtain the best out of this cathartic experience, please answer
the following questionnaire:
1. Who are you?
(a) A depressed republican
(b) A serial killer
(c) Cocodrile Dundee
(d) Rikki Lake
2. How often do you cry?
(a) Every night
(b) Twice a night
(c) Everytime I eat my applejacks
(d) I am crying right now
3. How often do you satisfy your sexual needs
(a) Once a week
(b) Once a month
(c) Evrytime England wins the world cup
(d) I am still a virgin
Thank you very much in advance for helping us with your treatment.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. Seitse, a.k.a. Xaviera Hollander
Originally posted by SeitseYou know you should really start trying to control Reader and Loose, they are running amok post messaging me up to 15 messages A DAY, then use me as there go between to play each other off and engage in mind games. ITS DRIVING ME happpy...
Dear Ms. CrissyB,
I am happy to see you joined our group therapy sessions. In order
to obtain the best out of this cathartic experience, please answer
the following questionnaire:
1. Who are you?
(a) A depressed republican
(b) A serial killer
(c) Cocodrile Dundee
(d) Rikki Lake
2. How often do you cry?
(a) Every night
(b) Twice a night
(c) E ...[text shortened]... for helping us with your treatment.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. Seitse, a.k.a. Xaviera Hollander
that aside, i am always here to help. you know that Sin-tse.
Now where was i.
1a) if you were to make your question more relevant so that it reflects the political parties of this sunburnt country then you would have to ask if i am a depressed liberal. but then you are implying that all people here are liberal supporters because you don't give me the option of being affiliated with any other political party, such as labour. so maybe you could have asked the question are you depressed with the political party that you support? Now in saying that, you would have to define "depressed". Do you mean the clinical definition of depressed or do you mean depressed in this context to mean that i am peeved. If i was the former then in effect I would find it difficult to get out of bed or feel i have anything to live for, or i am cleaning my kitchen floor by licking it (Cadwah), or i have multiple personalities that are having a party in my head and i aint invited (Loose). Now, i don't know about you but no political party is going to have that type of effect on me. Therefore, i think you mean the latter, that i may be peeved with the political party i support because then that would mean that i am unhappy with their policies and conduct and i can't wait until election time when i hold them accountable by voting for another party (like my vote counts!). in answer to 1(a) i would have to respond in the negative.
Am I serial killer. well that depends what you mean by "serial". how many do i have to kill before i am labelled a "serial" killer. Can i kill once every 10 years or do i have to kill on a regular basis or yearly basis. do i have to have a common pattern to my killings such as a preferred method or can i just be drunk and kill wantonly. But no, i haven't killed anything in my life.
1(c) Cocodrile Dundee - come again. whats a cocodrile?
1(d) who?
If you rewrite the questions for (c) and (d) i would be only too happy to answer them at length for you.
How often do i cry? thats easy. Everytime i see a picture of Brad Pitt with Angelina Jolie that always bring tears to my eyes. I currently subscribe to 12 women's magazines in which 2 come out on the same day and the others on alternate days. so i cry 12 times a week. If only that was me and not her!!!
Do you really need to know question 3, or am i detecting ulterior motives here. you place both hands on the table where i can see them, then i will consider answering it.
I am quite happy to do any further questionnaires, if you think that will help me.
Who is Xaviera Hollander? should i know him or her?
Dear Ms. B,
Aren't you North American? I apologize for the mistake, yet I
got confused by your forum avatar. Actually, the utter intention
of questionnaire's point 1 is to asses the degree of depression
caused by the social situation surrounding your maniac fixiation
with cadwah and Loose Screw.
I would recommend, in that matter, to include Ms. Reader in your
inner Olympus.
As for the crying, I would like to hear more details about your
thoughts regarding Brad and Angelina, if you don't mind 🙂
By the way, my hands are on the table.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. Seitse, a.k.a. Jeff Stryker
P.S. Sorry, I meant crocodile 😉
Originally posted by chrissybDr. Seitse, please tell reader and chrissyb to give back my mediations!!!!!!!
You know you should really start trying to control Reader and Loose, they are running amok post messaging me up to 15 messages A DAY, then use me as there go between to play each other off and engage in mind games. ITS DRIVING ME happpy...
They keep taking it away from me.
Help me please ..... please!!!!
The voices, the voices, they're screaming all at once ........
Ahhhhh ........... HHHHHeeeeeellllllllppppppppppppp ..............
.......
Originally posted by SeitseNo, i'm Australian and thats ok, no need to apologise.
Dear Ms. B,
Aren't you North American? I apologize for the mistake, yet I
got confused by your forum avatar. Actually, the utter intention
of questionnaire's point 1 is to asses the degree of depression
caused by the social situation surrounding your maniac fixiation
with cadwah and Loose Screw.
I would recommend, in that matter, to include Ms. Read ...[text shortened]... ble.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. Seitse, a.k.a. Jeff Stryker
P.S. Sorry, I meant crocodile 😉
Me fixated with Loose, Cadwah and Reader? Never! I just felt sorry for Reader because she wanted to play with the other two's heads while you weren't here. And true to my avatar, i was trying to help a lost cause, all of them. Seriously Sin-tse talk about one flew over the cuckooos nest.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, you can't put two and two together. i am extremely jealous!!! and i buy the magazines not only to see him, but because they keep reporting they are on the verge of breaking up, so i look forward to the day when i can read that. In fact not an hour goes by without me wishing that upon them, because then maybe i could replace Angelina as the woman in Brad's life. I have 4 walls dedicated to Brad with photos of me (imposed) and him all over it. after i cut out Angelina's photo, i like to put it in the shredder and shred her face only, then i send it to their Beverly Hills address and when they were staying in Namibia i sent a package load over there 😏
Your location says 1800 B-my-Donkey and you expect me to believe your hands are on the table, tut tut Sin-tse.
yeah i know you meant crocodile, i just wanted to irritate you if you weren't already 🙄
Originally posted by Loose ScrewSugar Pills for the 10th time!!!
Dr. Seitse, please tell reader and chrissyb to give back my mediations!!!!!!!
They keep taking it away from me.
Help me please ..... please!!!!
The voices, the voices, they're screaming all at once ........
Ahhhhh ........... HHHHHeeeeeellllllllppppppppppppp ..............
.......
Originally posted by chrissybDear Dr. Seitse,
You know you should really start trying to control Reader and Loose, they are running amok post messaging me up to 15 messages A DAY, then use me as there go between to play each other off and engage in mind games. ITS DRIVING ME happpy...
that aside, i am always here to help. you know that Sin-tse.
Now where was i.
1a) if you were to make your ...[text shortened]... f you think that will help me.
Who is Xaviera Hollander? should i know him or her?
Sorry, she found the Ritalin again. You really should keep these meds locked up!
And really, how is having sex as often as England wins the World Cup and being a virgin all that different?
Originally posted by reader1107Dear reader,
Dear Dr. Seitse,
Sorry, she found the Ritalin again. You really should keep these meds locked up!
And really, how is having sex as often as England wins the World Cup and being a virgin all that different?
As a matter of fact my sexual life used to be very similar
to the English success in football, yet I discovered how convenient
is to switch from football to ice hockey as a favorite sport to
tie own's sex life to.
🙂
As for the lady down under who has a fixiation with everybody,
including Bread and Angina, I will gladly issue you with the 1st
Dr. Seitse's virtual divan license to you, so you can deal with her.
I think she needs to take care of the geckos 😉
Yours as always,
Dr. Swirl