Funny joke

Originally posted by Dr Strangelove
Thank you for reposting my joke.

[Posted a few days ago - 20 Jul '06 16:53]

http://www.redhotpawn.com/board/showthread.php?threadid=8622&page=64

Bob's eyes were going bad ,but he couldn't afford to go see an optometrist,so he went to see an optimist instead.
He was told that everything was going to bejust fine.
That left him feeling good until he walked down the middle of the road and got hit by a car because he couldn't see it coming.

A guy comes home with a duck under his arm. His wife meets him at the door. He says, "Look at the pig I've been fvcking!" She says, "That's not a pig; that's a duck." He says, "I wasn't talking to you."

Why did the feminist cross the road?
To suck my d1ck

i have a slightly funny one: a teacher and a 6 year old girl are talking and the girl says, was "moses really in a whale's belly?"
the teacher goes "i don't know"
and the little girl goes, "when i get to heaven, i'll ask him"
and the teacher smiles and says "what if moses went to hell?"
to that, the innocent little girl said, "well then you ask him!"

A man enters a bar and orders ten beer. He drinks them and orders ten more. The bartender asks, "Why do you drink that much ?"

Man says, "today was the first time in my life I had oral sex"

Bartender says, "That's indeed a reason to celebrate"

Man replies, "No, I'm trying to wash away the taste"

A teacher was having a tasting day where she would put candy in the kids' mouth and they would guess what it was. She went to the first little boy and put a Hershey's Kiss in his mouth.

"Can you guess what it is?"

"I don't know," said the boy.

"I'll give you a hint. It's something your daddy asks your mommy for every morning."

The girl next to the boy says "Don't eat it. It's a piece of ass."

Originally posted by ThudanBlunder
Two Arabs from the same small village in Egypt emigrate to Texas. When they arrive they have a wager: they will meet in exactly one year, and the winner will be the one who's made himself more American. The meeting happens, and the first says, "Waal, y'know, ah got up yesserday mornin', mowed the lawn, cleaned out the pool, took m'boy to a Little Leagu ...[text shortened]... as loud as we could. How 'bout you?"

"Fcuk off, towelhead," says the other.

All Paul Mccartneys'wife' wants is one thing from their divorce settlement, The Plane.............she got a razor for the other leg.

Paul was asked "would u ever go down on one knee again?" he replied "I prefer it if you called her Heather"

Originally posted by chess player 323
i have a slightly funny one: a teacher and a 6 year old girl are talking and the girl says, was "moses really in a whale's belly?"
the teacher goes "i don't know"
and the little girl goes, "when i get to heaven, i'll ask him"
and the teacher smiles and says "what if moses went to hell?"
to that, the innocent little girl said, "well then you ask him!"

Jonah

Originally posted by Miss A from Uk
Jonah

Originally posted by Pawnokeyhole
I always found that story hard to swallow.

Originally posted by c99ux
Swallow, do you?

Brave man to admit it...

Originally posted by Bowmann
And exactly how many stories have you managed to ejaculate?