Originally posted by wormwoodAnd Nordlysk, a lot of the posts seem to be taking this stance.
yeah, I know. old people are boring.
Maybe if there is a value judgement or observation it's that society is so inundated with these images of Jackasses who run around destroying that we've forgotten the importance of basic human kindness.
And maybe this relates to my experiences on this forum
And maybe this is at least partially an age thing.
Originally posted by Freddie2006I'm basically pretty liberal in real life. My 11 year old daughter goes out on her own. She has a TV in her room. My wife makes her use the computer in the kitchen.
(Tell me if I start crossing the line, I don't intend to)
Are you very conservative with 11 year old? I mean, do you have old fashioned parental values? For example, would you let your child walk down to the local shop on their own? I only ask because the image that you put across in the forums is one that makes me imagine you would be a very strict p ...[text shortened]... sut wonder how your values and ideas are put across in your parenting, if you see what I mean.
I wouldn't say that I was strict with her in anyway. My parents and my in-laws think that we are way to lenient with her.
We have certain rules, but not that many. Interestingly, one is that she isn't allowed to watch Fox News network. (She wouldn't watch this on her own, it is more of a rule to stop certain visitors from watching it in her presence.)
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Originally posted by Red NightIs there a particular reason for the computer being in the kitchen? Would you object to her logging onto RHP when she turns thirteen if she shows an interest in chess?
I'm basically pretty liberal in real life. My 11 year old daughter goes out on her own. She has a TV in her room. My wife makes her use the computer in the kitchen.
I wouldn't say that I was strict with her in anyway. My parents and my in-laws think that we are way to lenient with her.
We have certain rules, but not that many. Interestingly, on her own, it is more of a rule to stop certain visitors from watching it in her presence.)
p.s. see last post's edit.
Originally posted by Freddie2006I would agree with this statement.
Do you feel that there is an element of Catch22 here, because if you give kids too much freedom they may become unruly, but if you keep them on too tight a leash then they will become subdued and have few social skills.
Actually thankful to have the chance to address this point in a less combative thread.
I would say that I probably ere on the side of too much freedom.
My point in the other threads wasn't so much about my own kids or your kids, but how to behave in public in front of other people's kids.
I went to a number of "good" schools and tended to run into a lot of children and young adults with very repressed social skills.
Originally posted by Freddie2006Now that I know RHP, I wouldn't encourage her to go to this site. There are other chess sites that I think are more suitable for children.
Is there a particular reason for the computer being in the kitchen? Would you object to her logging onto RHP when she turns thirteen if she shows an interest in chess?
p.s. see last post's edit.
My wife thinks that the computer should be in the kitchen so that she can monitor what websites our daughter goes to. I would probably have let her have it in her room.
Maybe my wife's right.
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Originally posted by Red NightI've been to good schools all my life, and encountered very few repressed people, probably because parents with money tend to be happy for their kids to go out and spend it.
I would agree with this statement.
Actually thankful to have the chance to address this point in a less combative thread.
I would say that I probably ere on the side of too much freedom.
My point in the other threads wasn't so much about my own kids or your kids, but how to behave in public in front of other people's kids.
I went to a number of and tended to run into a lot of children and young adults with very repressed social skills.
If/when I become a parent, I wouldn't be able to stand my kids lacking freedom. If I only got to give them one thing, it would be as much freedom as I could give them without feeling overly worried. I would much rather my kid starting having the occasional smoke and drink and try a bit of pot with his mates aged 13, as I did, rather than being the kid who spends his weekends playing Halo and Counter Strike indoors all day. I probably get this from my mum, who once said to me, "I don't mind if your smoking pot, as long as it's the good stuff."
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Originally posted by abejnoodWe went outside and played sports and dated girls and went to pubs and laughed and hung out. We listened to music on the radio and travelled to interesting places.
14. Man, you're ancient.😛
So, what kinds of things did you do before they introduced the web some 12 years ago?
Pretty much all the same stuff you do virtually now.
Originally posted by Red NightA large percentage of people (and teenagers are still people) are simply moronic and love moronic humour.
I'm flipping through the channels LAST NIGHT and I pause for a few minutes on an MTV show called Viva La Bam. I didn't really understand what was going on but these young kids spent the entire 5 minutes that I could stomach wrecking stuff and beating on each other. They smashed the windows on some homeless guy's trailer spewing glass all over him in his b ...[text shortened]... The Juxtaposition of these two events really caused me to think that maybe I am out of touch.
What else is new?
Originally posted by Freddie2006I think that's a good attitude.
I've been to good schools all my life, and encountered very few repressed people, probably because parents with money tend to be happy for their kids to go out and spend it.
If/when I become a parent, I wouldn't be able to stand my kids lacking freedom. If I only got to give them one thing, it would be as much freedom as I could give them without fee ...[text shortened]... , who once said to me, "I don't mind if your smoking pot, as long as it's the good stuff."
In terms of the "good" schools, there were definatley indulged rich kids. I'm talking more about the middle and lower-middle class kids that got there on merit with overly intrusive parents driving them.
Originally posted by Red NightIf I were in your situation, I'd probably give her the computer in her room, but insist on being able to monitor what she looks at if you feel like it. It won't serve any purpose having a parent looking over a kid's shoulder all the time, especially when they are at an age when they want to start learning about things they may be embarressed for you to know they know about.
Now that I know RHP, I wouldn't encourage her to go to this site. There are other chess sites that I think are more suitable for children.
My wife thinks that the computer should be in the kitchen so that she can monitor what websites our daughter goes to. I would probably have let her have it in her room.
Maybe my wife's right.
What age do you think would be right for your child to start using RHP should she wish to? This is where we have our difference of opinion, because I feel that there is no problem with a child reading anything in these forums. If it were my kid, I would hope that they would ask me about it if they didn't understand, and I would certainly keep an weary eye on them in the forums, but I wouldn't deny them access to the site, especially if they showed an interest in the site. It's important for kids to learn about everything, not just things parents feel they should know.
Originally posted by Freddie2006Why would you keep a weary eye on the forums?
If I were in your situation, I'd probably give her the computer in her room, but insist on being able to monitor what she looks at if you feel like it. It won't serve any purpose having a parent looking over a kid's shoulder all the time, especially when they are at an age when they want to start learning about things they may be embarressed for you to k ...[text shortened]... portant for kids to learn about everything, not just things parents feel they should know.