Jokes

divegeester walked into a busy restaurant and asked: "Hello, is my table ready?” The manager said: ”No, not yet sir. Do you mind waiting?” divegeester shrugged and said: ”No, that’s okay.” The manager handed divegeester a gin and tonic and said: ”Great, then take this to table six, would you?”

FMF walked into a restaurant and confused the hell out of the staff by asking for a curates egg.

@the-gravedigger said
FMF walked into a restaurant and confused the hell out of the staff by asking for a curates egg.

Executioner Brand walked into a pub and said to the barman, “A pint of Christmas Island Lager, please mate.”
The barman asked: “Are you 18?”
Executioner Brand said, “No.”
The barman said: “I can’t serve you then.”
As Executioner Brand walked out, he thought to himself, “This is the fourth pub... what does a 22-year-old have to do to get a pint of lager around here?”