Q Hullo Joe, glad you could make it.
A No problem, I have been very busy this week.
Q What have you been up to?
A. I have just come from the 2010 International Design Award presentations in Hollywood.
Q. What can you tell us about that Joe?
A. Well every year we judge all of the terrific designs in technology, science, industry and the arts.
Q So what was the design that took first place Joe?
A. Well it was a hard decision, because there where so many great ideas, but the winner was a mind reading device, that you wear on your head, that knows what channel you want to change on your TV…and that means we no longer need to pick up the remote control, and push the buttons, its fantastic, you just have to think of the channel and it changes right before your eyes.
Q. Well Joe, that’s certainly is a great design, but do you think its really necessary, and did it cost much to create this device, and how much will one cost to own?
A. Actually it only took 17 scientists 3 years to design, at a bargin cost of 1.2 billion dollars, and if you want to be the lucky owner of “The Channel Changing Device” you can buy them from Tandy for only $1299.
Q. Joe, being a self confest atheist, in a previous interview, you said that scientists don’t recognize that the universe suggest design, but you have clearly applauded the efforts of the designers that created this thingo, why is that Joe?
A. We scientist are the keepers of truth, and with regards to the universe and everything in it, we haven’t been able to find a designer, and we have looked everywhere.
Q Where have the scientists looked Joe?
A. Well the Government gave us a lot of money, and we bought a big telescope, and we have been looking through it for a long time, and we haven’t seen a designer anywhere, and your welcome to come and look for yourself anytime you want, but you wont find a designer anywhere, because where scientists and we have already done all the looking required,. but feel free to give it another go.
Q. Joe, many people say that the universe and all the complex arrangements within, is proof that there is intelligent design behind it, and that alone is enough to conclude that there is a designer behind it, what do you say?
A. We are the scientists, and are keepers of the truth, and if we say there is no intelligent design behind the workings of the universe, then that must be the truth.
Q. But Joe, the “Channel Changer” was designed by many intelligent people, and it didn’t just create itself, so why do you claim the universe is any different?
A. aaaah what!
Q Joe why do you say the universe and all the complexity, is not a product of design, when your “Channel Changer” is definitely designed by a conscious living scientist?
A. The universe and all the very, very, very, very, complex arrangements in it, is just a miracle, no sorry, I mean just a random accident, and that’s all there is to say.
Q. But Joe, all the scientists agree that everything that can be perceived, has a cause, and your “Channel Changer” is complex and has its cause, as you can very well agree, so why do you say that the universe has no cause.
A. We scientists don’t say that, we say the cause was the Big Bang, and after the Big Bang, there was a random accident, that caused life to appear, and over a long time that life changed into millions of functioning complex species, including humans.
Q. Joe we have talked about the Big Bang before, so what existed before the Big Bang?
A. We don’t know.
Q. Joe what caused the Big Bang?
A. We don’t know.
Q. What was the Big Bang?
A. Well there was nothing, and then the nothing became something, and then the something exploded, and now I drive a BMW…..pretty cool huh!
Q. Joe Iam getting a headache, can we continue later?
A. What is this too complex for you to understand, you should go and get a science degree, and then you will………..catch you later.