Lisa: "Don't you think you're overreacting?"
Homer: "Don't you think you're underreacting?"
Lisa: "This conversation is over."
Homer: "This conversation is under!"
Lisa: "Goodbye."
Homer: "Badbye!"
From the same spisode:
Bart (In Homer's dream): "He thought that trip to the guillotine factory was just for fun, but it was the perfect place to shoot him."
I don't think this one has been mentioned before:
Chief Wiggum on phone: "Uh, Mrs. Simpson, I have some bad news. Your husband was found DOA. "
Marge: "Oh my god! He's dead? "
Chief Wiggum: "Oh, I'm sorry. He was DUI. I get those two confused. hangs up phone"
Woman walks in: "My name is Mrs. Phillips. You said my husband was DUI?"
Chief Wiggum: "Uh... talk to one of those officers over there. I'm going to lunch..."
😀😀
BLACKBOARD QUOTES:
I will not torment the emotionally frail
I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge
This punishment is not boring and pointless
I will not yell "She's dead" during roll call
I do not have diplomatic immunity
I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause
I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers
Next time it could be me on the scaffolding
The Good Humor man can only be pushed so far
Indian burns are not our cultural heritage
I will stop talking about the twelve inch pianist
I no longer want my MTV
Everyone is tired of that Richard Gere story
Sherri does not "got back"
I have neither been there nor done that
I will stop phoning it in
Substitute teachers are not scabs
My suspension was not "mutual"
A belch is not an oral report
"Non-Flammable" is not a challenge
I will not surprise the incontinent
The nurse is not dealing
Science class should not end in tragedy
Network TV is not dead
"Temptation Island" was not a sleazy piece of crap
I will not scare the Vice President
Nobody reads these anymore
The giving tree is not a chump
This school does not need a "regime change"
SpongeBob is not a contraceptive
I'm not sure if this one has been posted yet.
Bart and Lisa are arguing: you love him more, no you love him more, no you.....
Then Homer says: stop that, what are you fighting about?
Bart: We're fighting over who loves you more, dad.
Homer: oh, that's sweet, carry on
Bart and Lisa: you love him more, no you do....
Originally posted by CKSuperintendant Chalmers (tries unsuccessfully to hide his chuckle): "Yes, well, that's... unfortunate. But I make a Superintendant's salary, which amply covers both food and car. I -- Jesus H. Christmas! My 'H' has been stolen! That's how people know it's a Honda! What's the point of havin' a Honda if you can't show it off!?"
Principal Skinner: "I've always admired car owners and I hope to be one myself as soon as I finish paying off mother. She insists I pay her retroactively for the food I ate as a child."
Tribute to musical guests!
................
Phish:
Trey: "Wait a minute, hold on... (sniffs) I smell marijuana smoke!"
Phil: "That better be medicinal."
John: "If Phish doesn't see a perscription slip, we are outa here, man!"
.................
Red Hot Chili Peppers:
Mark: "Hi, Moe."
Flea (REALLY loud and obnoxious): "HEY MOE!"
Moe: "Hey, you guys can't come in here dressed in your underwear."
Dr. Hibbard: "Get with the times, Moe."
Wiggum: "Yeah, I say, if it feels good, do it!"
...................
Paul McCartney: "If you play 'Maybe I'm Amazed' backwards, there's a really rippin' recipe for lenthol soup!"
...................
Elton John: "That's my name... well, not really."
...................
Bette Midler:
Krusty the clown: "We used to have a race horse together. Krudler!"
....................
Elvis Costello: "Not everybody can play guitar. But there's lots of great instruments. Like bass. Now, who wants to be a bass player?"
.....................
Mick Jaggar: "Simson!"