The Simpsons

Marge (looking through the mail): "Oooh, a free sample!"
Homer: "Give it here!" (begins drinking it in large gulps)
Marge: "Homer, that's dish soap!"
Homer (foaming at the mouth): "Yeah, but what are you gunna do." (proceeds to drink it nonchlantly) 🙄

At Halloween:

Marge: (looks at homer) Homer, you're not going as a hobo again.
Homer: Going where? 😀

Monty Burns: 'release the hounds'

Monty Burns - presses trapdoor button - the trapdoor opens some distance away from where the intended victims are standing. Smithers: 'The painters moved your desk, sir'. Monty (deflated): 'Oh yes'.

Monty Burns with the flying monkeys from Wizard of Oz, sending them off to do some evil: 'Fly, my lovelies'. They flap their wings but plummet to the ground outside the window.😛

Grandpa Simpson ringing up women on a trip to Britain to try and find his WW2 sweetheart...

"Hello, did you date an American soldier duaring WW2? U DID,
Was he in the 2nd Infantry HE WAS!
and was he a gentle caring lover? HE WAS?
Sorry to bother u...😞

Homer: I got lepracy? So the fortunecookie was right!

Homer: Mr. Burns releases the hounds on everybody: on save the whales, rescue the rainforest, even on release the hounds.

Marge: "Homer, the plant called. They said if you don't come in tomorrow, don't bother coming in on Monday."
Homer: "Woo-hoo! Four-day weekend!"

Bart:"Remember, you can always find East by staring directly at the sun."
🙂🙂😀

Homer "Don't worry, son. I'm sure he's up in heaven right now laughing it up with all the other celebrities: John Dilinger, Ty Cobb, Joseph Stalin." (on death of cat).


😛🙂

Ms Krabapple, listing all the illnesses Bart has recently faked to get out of school:

<list of diseases>...and that unfortunate bout of Tourette's.

Bart: "I really miss that dog."
Milhouse: "Sounds like you were the only one. Remember that time he ate my goldfish? And then you lied and said I never had a goldfish? Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl?"
Bart: "Yeah. He was a great dog."

Originally posted by marinakatomb
Grandpa Simpson ringing up women on a trip to Britain to try and find his WW2 sweetheart...

"Hello, did you date an American soldier duaring WW2? U DID,
Was he in the 2nd Infantry HE WAS!
and was he a gentle caring lover? HE WAS?
Sorry to bother u...😞

Kent Brockman: by organizing the Olympics Springfield hopes to experience the same boom Sarajevo did after organizing the '84 games.

Homer: Everybody won an award but me, why won't anybody give me an award?
Lisa: Dad, you won a grammy!
Homer: I mean an award that is worth winning.
Then the subtitles read: Mr. Simpson's opinion does not represent the meaning of the producers of this show. We don't consider the grammy to be an award at all.

Originally posted by haarlem
Kent Brockman: by organizing the Olympics Springfield hopes to experience the same boom Sarajevo did after organizing the '84 games.

At the State Fair:

Homer: See, I told you they could deep-fry my shirt!
Marge: I didn't say they couldn't. I said you shouldn't!!
Homer walks around with a big grin on his face
🙂

I'm not sure this one has been posted before (it should have):

Bill Clinton: when things don't go your way, just keep complaining untill they do.
Marge: That's a pretty lousy lesson.
Bill Clinton: Yeah, well I'm a pretty lousy president.

Originally posted by haarlem
I'm not sure this one has been posted before (it should have):

Bill Clinton: when things don't go your way, just keep complaining untill they do.
Marge: That's a pretty lousy lesson.
Bill Clinton: Yeah, well I'm a pretty lousy president.